1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
Edit, Sync and Cleaned - DirtySaint, 04, Feb 2019

2
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Yeah, Walter. Hi, it's George.

3
00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:16,886
I know it's my third call on a Saturday,

4
00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:20,973
but I'm having a bit of a problem
with the Lockwise Helping Hand account.

5
00:02:21,058 --> 00:02:24,268
Now, I know it's your baby,
and I know you'll straighten it out,

6
00:02:24,353 --> 00:02:28,648
but, well, I'm thinking of heading into
the office today to see if I can sort it out.

7
00:02:28,732 --> 00:02:31,984
So, no problems. We'll see you on Monday.

8
00:02:32,069 --> 00:02:35,947
Don't worry about it.
Give my Iove to Rebecca. Bye-bye.

9
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- Barbara, stop it.
- No.

10
00:02:40,369 --> 00:02:42,537
- You need this.
- No, I will not.

11
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George!

12
00:02:44,081 --> 00:02:45,915
George, yes. Where is George?

13
00:02:46,041 --> 00:02:48,042
- I would Iike to speak to him.
- I don't know.

14
00:02:48,126 --> 00:02:50,586
I don't even know who you are, young Iady.

15
00:02:51,713 --> 00:02:53,214
- George.
- Thank God.

16
00:02:53,298 --> 00:02:55,716
George, who is this young Iady?

17
00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:58,094
- Here, honey.
- That's...

18
00:02:58,220 --> 00:02:59,971
I can't do this.

19
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That's my wife, Mom.

20
00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:04,475
No. She's too young.

21
00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:06,269
How old is she?

22
00:03:06,395 --> 00:03:08,020
We were married nine years ago, remember?

23
00:03:08,105 --> 00:03:09,730
She's nine years old?

24
00:03:09,815 --> 00:03:13,317
Our marriage is nine years old,
our marriage.

25
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She's the second one.

26
00:03:20,784 --> 00:03:23,536
No. I adored the other one.

27
00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:26,414
I know, Mom, but,
you know, she tried to kill me.

28
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No, she didn't.
That was just a Iittle hit-and-run.

29
00:03:29,084 --> 00:03:31,752
Yeah, well, I was in traction for two months.

30
00:03:31,837 --> 00:03:33,754
I don't remember that.

31
00:03:35,257 --> 00:03:37,633
- Here you go.
- I Iike this one.

32
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- Well, that's the most popular one.
- Yeah.

33
00:03:40,971 --> 00:03:42,471
There you go.

34
00:03:46,685 --> 00:03:49,478
- We aren't done with this.
- Yes, I know. I know.

35
00:03:49,605 --> 00:03:52,231
And why are you wearing a shirt and tie
on a Saturday?

36
00:03:52,316 --> 00:03:54,108
I have to go into the office.

37
00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:56,277
- You're going into the office?
- Yes.

38
00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:58,029
- When?
- Now.

39
00:03:58,113 --> 00:04:01,115
George, aren't you forgetting something?

40
00:04:02,159 --> 00:04:04,118
No, I'm not.

41
00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:06,454
I Iove you.

42
00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:09,624
Nice try. Your son.

43
00:04:09,750 --> 00:04:13,252
You promised him you would take him
to his baseball game today.

44
00:04:13,337 --> 00:04:16,339
I'm not telling him this time. You do it.

45
00:04:16,465 --> 00:04:21,010
Honey, I'll be back in time.
The game doesn't start until 2:00.

46
00:04:21,136 --> 00:04:22,136
1 :00.

47
00:04:22,763 --> 00:04:24,430
I'll be back.

48
00:04:24,598 --> 00:04:27,808
Mom, Dad, Grandma isn't eating.

49
00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:32,480
God, I hate old people.

50
00:04:32,481 --> 00:04:34,315
Watch your mouth, young Iady.

51
00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:37,276
Why? It's not Iike she understands
anything we're saying.

52
00:04:37,361 --> 00:04:40,029
You know what? I've had
just about enough of your attitude.

53
00:04:41,156 --> 00:04:43,199
Hello? You Iistening?

54
00:04:43,492 --> 00:04:47,161
iPod. They were made
to ignore the stepmother.

55
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:48,245
George?

56
00:04:48,330 --> 00:04:51,332
Honey, would you take those things off,
please, and Iisten to your mother?

57
00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:54,669
Okay, she is not my mother.

58
00:04:55,212 --> 00:04:57,004
She's the mother of that thing.

59
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- You're the thing.
- You're a thing.

60
00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:01,634
- You're a thing, sister.
- Don't call me that.

61
00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:05,680
Dad, I'm really excited
about the game today.

62
00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:08,140
It's gonna be so cool having you there.

63
00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:12,853
Jeremy's dad is always there,
but he yells at me if I miss the ball.

64
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:14,980
Well, that's not gonna happen today, son.

65
00:05:15,065 --> 00:05:16,691
Now, I've got to run to the office,

66
00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:19,360
but I'll be back in time
to take you to your game.

67
00:05:19,444 --> 00:05:20,778
You promise?

68
00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:23,698
Scout's honor.

69
00:05:28,787 --> 00:05:29,787
Don't forget. I:00.

70
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He's not coming.

71
00:05:31,790 --> 00:05:34,208
That was the Star Trek sign.

72
00:05:34,292 --> 00:05:35,876
He's a Trekkie.

73
00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:37,878
And so am I.

74
00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:07,742
- Morning, Jackie.
- Hello.

75
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Don't you wish it was this quiet every day?

76
00:06:10,328 --> 00:06:12,538
Be careful what you wish for.

77
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Gotta be mine

78
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Gotta be strong

79
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A Iittle while

80
00:06:38,857 --> 00:06:42,526
And you got nothing to be guilty of

81
00:06:42,611 --> 00:06:44,528
You might not wanna sing that song.

82
00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:55,039
Okay. Shred everything.

83
00:06:55,332 --> 00:06:57,333
My shredder's broken.
I need another shredder!

84
00:06:57,417 --> 00:06:58,793
- Here we go!
- Who's got one?

85
00:06:58,877 --> 00:07:00,127
Don't Ieave any evidence. Nothing. Okay?

86
00:07:00,212 --> 00:07:01,879
- Put 'em in a box!
- Let me through. Let me through.

87
00:07:01,963 --> 00:07:04,799
Shred everything! Here, here. Right here!

88
00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:09,929
AII the boxes!

89
00:07:12,182 --> 00:07:14,433
AII right. Grab those two!
What are you doing?

90
00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:17,436
Just get it in here! Anything!

91
00:07:20,232 --> 00:07:21,649
I got one more!

92
00:07:21,733 --> 00:07:23,567
- Is it the Iast quarter?
- Yeah.

93
00:07:25,904 --> 00:07:26,987
Dump everything!

94
00:07:29,074 --> 00:07:30,157
George, come in here, buddy.

95
00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:32,952
Come in, come in, come in.

96
00:07:33,078 --> 00:07:34,829
Walter, what's going on?

97
00:07:34,913 --> 00:07:36,831
Hey, Iisten, pull your money out of the bank,

98
00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:39,583
cash in all your stocks and bonds
by 10:00 a.m. Monday morning.

99
00:07:40,085 --> 00:07:41,126
Why?

100
00:07:41,545 --> 00:07:44,713
Well, CNN is doing
one of those investigative reports

101
00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:46,507
about Lockwise Industries.

102
00:07:48,343 --> 00:07:50,845
That's fantastic.
That'll be great for business.

103
00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:54,807
Not really. They're gonna say we've been
running a Ponzi scheme for seven years.

104
00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:59,520
Well, they can't say that, Walter.
That's Iibelous.

105
00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:03,357
I mean, this firm's been operating
successfully for over 100 years.

106
00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:07,152
Yeah, yeah, they're focusing
on the charity division, Helping Hands.

107
00:08:07,237 --> 00:08:10,281
Helping Hands has been going strong
for over eight years.

108
00:08:10,365 --> 00:08:11,699
I should know. I'm CFO.

109
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Yeah. Yeah, you are.

110
00:08:14,119 --> 00:08:16,412
Could you say that again,
the part about the CFO?

111
00:08:17,247 --> 00:08:19,540
I'm CFO. I should know.

112
00:08:19,958 --> 00:08:21,834
Right. Perfect, perfect. Thanks.

113
00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:26,672
Walter, are they reporting
that it's our division?

114
00:08:27,048 --> 00:08:28,507
Yeah. Your division.

115
00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:30,509
But I have all the records.

116
00:08:31,094 --> 00:08:32,928
Say that again.

117
00:08:33,847 --> 00:08:35,973
But I have all the records.

118
00:08:36,141 --> 00:08:38,017
Perfect. Now shred them.

119
00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:39,894
- Walter.
- Yeah.

120
00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:41,937
What are you saying?

121
00:08:42,314 --> 00:08:43,981
I'm saying that all the monies

122
00:08:44,065 --> 00:08:48,903
that came into Lockwise Industries'
Helping Hands charity investment group

123
00:08:48,987 --> 00:08:51,196
are part of a big, old Ponzi scheme.

124
00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:53,324
What?

125
00:08:53,992 --> 00:08:55,284
Yeah. Christ.

126
00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:57,828
It worked for a while.

127
00:08:58,204 --> 00:09:00,789
I almost feel bad for hanging
you out to dry Iike this.

128
00:09:00,874 --> 00:09:03,584
You should see your face, dude.

129
00:09:04,085 --> 00:09:07,463
And by the way,
this is not gonna be pretty for you.

130
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,548
I feel awful.

131
00:09:09,633 --> 00:09:10,883
Horrible.

132
00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:12,509
What? But...

133
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:14,261
For me?

134
00:09:14,346 --> 00:09:16,597
You were a Iowly accountant, remember?

135
00:09:16,681 --> 00:09:20,476
And then I pull you out of bookkeeping
and make you the CFO.

136
00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:23,687
I mean, you had no experience
whatsoever. None. None at all.

137
00:09:23,772 --> 00:09:27,483
I had worked here five years
prior to that, Walter.

138
00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:32,488
- I was working hard. I thought I earned it.
- You did work hard.

139
00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:36,408
Nobody earns it around here.
I had to bang my way to the top.

140
00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:39,036
And there's a Iot of big women
on the Board of Directors here.

141
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:42,164
And that was hard,
and it was hard to stay hard.

142
00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:44,875
So don't talk to me about "hard."

143
00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:50,047
Okay? You were paid a seven-figure salary
for exactly this reason.

144
00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:51,924
What reason?

145
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:56,971
So you could take the fall.
Man, you've been paid to be screwed.

146
00:09:57,055 --> 00:09:59,264
Kind ofjealous. Oh, well.

147
00:09:59,516 --> 00:10:03,268
Walter, I knew nothing about this.

148
00:10:03,353 --> 00:10:05,729
Yeah, I know. I know. Sorry.

149
00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:08,524
Would have ruined it if you had, kind of.

150
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:14,071
Well, that explains why I couldn't get
those accounts to balance.

151
00:10:14,155 --> 00:10:15,739
Now you're thinking.

152
00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:19,994
What about the charities?
Walter, 82 charities.

153
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:21,704
They think their monies are safe.

154
00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,914
I'm handing you over to the Feds,

155
00:10:24,082 --> 00:10:27,835
and all you care about
is the stupid charities?

156
00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:30,671
By the way, there's only 12 charities.

157
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,966
There's 82 charities.

158
00:10:34,426 --> 00:10:38,595
No, there's 12. The other 70 companies
were set up by the Malone family.

159
00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:41,098
Awkward.

160
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:44,768
The Mafia Malones?

161
00:10:45,020 --> 00:10:47,271
You've been Iaundering money, dude.

162
00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:50,107
Yeah, this is gonna be really awful for you.

163
00:10:51,568 --> 00:10:53,193
Hey, man, be careful
when you start your car.

164
00:10:56,197 --> 00:10:58,532
This is not happening.

165
00:10:59,034 --> 00:11:02,536
A Ponzi scheme? A Ponzi scheme?

166
00:11:03,455 --> 00:11:07,374
Walter, where are the investors' monies?

167
00:11:09,627 --> 00:11:12,254
Walter? Walter!

168
00:11:19,804 --> 00:11:25,726
Okay, calm down. Calm, calm, calm.
Calm down.

169
00:11:25,810 --> 00:11:27,686
That's it. That's it.

170
00:11:27,771 --> 00:11:30,564
Just calm down.

171
00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:34,943
I'm not calming. I'm not calming.
I'm not calming.

172
00:11:50,418 --> 00:11:52,669
- Hey, boss, just the person I wanna see.
- What do you have?

173
00:11:52,754 --> 00:11:55,339
So I've been Iooking
into the Malone crime family, right?

174
00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:56,423
And the more I Iook at them,

175
00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:58,175
I'm finding that they're connected
to this company

176
00:11:58,259 --> 00:12:00,677
that does a Iot of charity
investment work, called Lockwise.

177
00:12:00,762 --> 00:12:01,762
Yes?

178
00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:03,764
I think they may be
Iaundering money through them.

179
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:06,266
- We've been after these guys for years.
- Yeah.

180
00:12:06,351 --> 00:12:08,435
Why don't you see
what you can find out, okay?

181
00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:09,853
Okay.

182
00:12:09,938 --> 00:12:11,438
Thanks a Iot.

183
00:13:13,334 --> 00:13:14,668
George?

184
00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:21,258
I've been calling you for hours.

185
00:13:22,760 --> 00:13:25,012
Yeah, I know. I know.

186
00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:26,722
How is he?

187
00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:30,350
- He was upset, but he'll be fine.
- That's good.

188
00:13:30,602 --> 00:13:32,269
Is it true?

189
00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:34,271
What?

190
00:13:34,355 --> 00:13:37,191
Come on, George.
Don't play games with me.

191
00:13:37,275 --> 00:13:39,943
AII the wives were talking about it
at the field today.

192
00:13:41,696 --> 00:13:42,863
Honey,

193
00:13:43,281 --> 00:13:47,326
I swear I had no idea this was going on.

194
00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:48,410
Okay? None.

195
00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:51,496
I walked into the office,
and there's Walter, and he's saying,

196
00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:54,374
"Why don't you shred stuff?
Shred whatever you have.

197
00:13:54,459 --> 00:13:56,668
"Shred what's in your desk.
Just shred everything."

198
00:13:56,753 --> 00:13:58,378
And I'm going, "What's going on?"

199
00:13:58,463 --> 00:14:00,380
And he's saying,
"You're gonna take the fall for this,

200
00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:04,509
"because it's a Ponzi scheme.
It's a Ponzi scheme, and you're the one.

201
00:14:04,594 --> 00:14:07,012
"You're going down,
'cause you're the CFO."

202
00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:12,059
You know? I mean, they gave
Bernie Madoff 200 years, honey.

203
00:14:12,143 --> 00:14:15,229
What do you think they're gonna do to me?
What do you think they're gonna do?

204
00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:18,190
And what's gonna happen with the kids?
What's gonna happen?

205
00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:20,734
Howie's afraid, you know,
"Dad, you missed a game."

206
00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:23,111
I'm gonna miss 38 seasons.

207
00:14:23,238 --> 00:14:25,614
Sweetheart, I'm in trouble.

208
00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:29,910
- Calm down.
- Okay.

209
00:14:32,247 --> 00:14:34,248
- We need to get a Iawyer.
- A Iawyer.

210
00:14:34,332 --> 00:14:36,625
And then you need to go to your mom's

211
00:14:36,751 --> 00:14:38,460
and go find your mom's Valium.

212
00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:40,504
Get a Valium out of my mom's purse.

213
00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:42,881
- Okay. Can you do that? Like right now.
- Okay.

214
00:14:42,966 --> 00:14:44,591
And you need to calm down.

215
00:14:45,260 --> 00:14:46,885
- Honey.
- It's gonna be okay.

216
00:14:46,970 --> 00:14:48,470
- It will be. It will be.
- Yes.

217
00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:51,765
You know, minimum security.
It's not that bad.

218
00:14:52,976 --> 00:14:54,184
Hey, Madea.

219
00:14:54,644 --> 00:14:57,938
Hey, Lorraine, how you doing?
Good to see you.

220
00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:05,279
Lord, it's a zoo up in there
on the first of the month.

221
00:15:14,289 --> 00:15:16,790
Excuse me, ma'am. You wanna take this?
I don't feel Iike taking it back.

222
00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:19,251
Thank you so much.
It's crazy up in there. Be careful.

223
00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:21,461
They ain't taking that EBT card.
They stopped taking that.

224
00:15:21,546 --> 00:15:23,547
I got to go somewhere else that take that.

225
00:15:24,007 --> 00:15:27,134
Yeah, I got to go burn up my EBT card.

226
00:15:33,975 --> 00:15:40,939
Give me your money.

227
00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:44,526
That's a cute Iittle gun you got, boy.
Get out this car.

228
00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:49,906
Lady, I will stab and shoot you.
Give me your money.

229
00:15:49,991 --> 00:15:52,159
Son, I'm gonna tell you this one time, okay?

230
00:15:52,243 --> 00:15:54,786
I want you to get out of this car
and go on about your business.

231
00:15:54,871 --> 00:15:56,204
Go get you a job.

232
00:15:56,331 --> 00:15:58,999
You ain't supposed to be stealing
from nobody working as hard as I...

233
00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:01,251
What the hell you got to come over here
and steal from the poor for?

234
00:16:01,336 --> 00:16:04,129
Get out the car. This is your warning, son.
Get out the car. Now, go on.

235
00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:05,881
Then give me your money!

236
00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:09,217
I worked for years to get my Social Security.
Now, I finally got it.

237
00:16:09,344 --> 00:16:10,427
I ain't on no fixed income.

238
00:16:10,511 --> 00:16:12,220
I'm on a broke income,
'cause I'm broke as hell.

239
00:16:12,347 --> 00:16:13,805
Now, I want you
to get the hell out of this car.

240
00:16:13,890 --> 00:16:17,392
This is your chance. Get out of the car, son.
Go on, now. Go get you a job.

241
00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:19,895
I'm gonna ask you one more time,
old woman.

242
00:16:20,021 --> 00:16:21,355
I'm gonna tell you one more time.

243
00:16:21,439 --> 00:16:26,026
Look here! Get out of this car.
Go find you a job. Do you understand me?

244
00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:28,779
They got people all over the world
that is working hard,

245
00:16:28,863 --> 00:16:31,281
and y'all young thugs gonna come
try to take money from somebody.

246
00:16:31,366 --> 00:16:33,116
That makes me mad.
Now, you about to make me mad.

247
00:16:33,201 --> 00:16:35,202
You about to piss me off.
Now, get on out the car, son.

248
00:16:35,370 --> 00:16:36,912
- I'm gonna count to three.
- Okay.

249
00:16:37,038 --> 00:16:41,792
One, two, three.

250
00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:45,128
Four.

251
00:16:46,422 --> 00:16:47,547
Five.

252
00:16:47,882 --> 00:16:51,343
I thought you was gonna count to three.
Son. Son, son, Iet me tell you something.

253
00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:53,303
Get out the car
and go on about your business.

254
00:16:53,388 --> 00:16:56,765
Now, this is your Iast chance.
This is your Iast chance. Now I got to go.

255
00:16:56,891 --> 00:17:01,395
One more time. One, two...

256
00:17:01,479 --> 00:17:02,729
Three!

257
00:17:08,903 --> 00:17:10,112
Let's go this way.

258
00:17:10,655 --> 00:17:12,823
Put your seat belt on.
You need a car seat?

259
00:17:13,408 --> 00:17:14,783
Come get my money!

260
00:17:15,118 --> 00:17:17,619
Trying to take my damn money
that I worked this hard for.

261
00:17:19,414 --> 00:17:20,580
Lady!

262
00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:22,290
I don't got insurance, Iady!

263
00:17:23,501 --> 00:17:24,793
Slow down! Slow down!

264
00:17:24,961 --> 00:17:27,504
You're screaming
straight up Iike a Iittle biatch!

265
00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:28,755
I want to go home!

266
00:17:32,093 --> 00:17:35,303
You want the money? You come get it.
I come get the money.

267
00:17:35,430 --> 00:17:37,305
- I'm a real thug! I'm a real thug!
- You crazy!

268
00:17:37,432 --> 00:17:38,849
Oh, my God!

269
00:17:43,438 --> 00:17:44,479
Jake!

270
00:17:44,856 --> 00:17:47,107
I'm sorry. Take it.

271
00:17:50,486 --> 00:17:51,736
Hey, what do you got?

272
00:17:51,821 --> 00:17:54,072
Well, just got off the phone with the SEC,

273
00:17:54,157 --> 00:17:58,368
and it seems that this Lockwise charity
is definitely a Ponzi scheme.

274
00:17:58,453 --> 00:18:00,162
COO, one Walter Burns.

275
00:18:00,329 --> 00:18:02,789
CFO, George Needleman.
Never heard of him.

276
00:18:02,999 --> 00:18:04,124
Let's arrest them both.

277
00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:06,042
Well, it turns out
that Burns is on a private jet,

278
00:18:06,127 --> 00:18:09,337
according to the FAA, to Europe.
Took off five hours ago.

279
00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:12,674
So I'm sure he's gonna fight extradition.
But our boy, George, now...

280
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,801
Boy George? I Iove Boy George.

281
00:18:15,136 --> 00:18:18,305
Karma karma karma karma karma chameleon

282
00:18:18,514 --> 00:18:22,517
You come and go
You come and go

283
00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:23,643
Sir?

284
00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:25,854
Sorry.

285
00:18:26,314 --> 00:18:29,483
George Needleman? Our guys should be
knocking at his door at any minute.

286
00:18:29,692 --> 00:18:30,775
Great.

287
00:18:30,860 --> 00:18:33,445
Well, it'd be great if we could get him
to testify against the Malones,

288
00:18:33,529 --> 00:18:34,571
but that may be a tall order.

289
00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:36,865
Okay, but no deal for him.

290
00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:40,368
Look, I'm tired of these people
sticking it to the poor.

291
00:18:40,495 --> 00:18:41,661
Sir, if we don't offer him a deal,

292
00:18:41,787 --> 00:18:45,040
what incentive does he have
to testify against the mob?

293
00:18:45,166 --> 00:18:46,666
It's very simple, Brian.

294
00:18:46,667 --> 00:18:49,836
If he testifies,
the Malones will probably kill him.

295
00:18:49,962 --> 00:18:53,465
If he doesn't,
he goes to prison for the rest of his Iife.

296
00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:55,175
It's a win-win.

297
00:18:56,469 --> 00:18:58,345
Sir, I think we should consider...

298
00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:00,013
No, you don't. I want him fried.

299
00:19:00,348 --> 00:19:03,850
Now, get our agents there
before the Malone family gets to him.

300
00:19:06,687 --> 00:19:07,812
Yes, sir.

301
00:19:08,689 --> 00:19:11,191
Hi, it's George Needleman
calling for Jeffrey.

302
00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:14,361
Yes, I'll hold.

303
00:19:15,863 --> 00:19:18,031
Where are my car keys?

304
00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:19,658
You don't drive anymore, Barbara.

305
00:19:19,742 --> 00:19:21,243
I know that.

306
00:19:21,911 --> 00:19:23,828
Dad, I wish you could have
been there today.

307
00:19:23,913 --> 00:19:25,956
Honey, your dad was very busy.

308
00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:28,541
You suck.
You should probably just give it up.

309
00:19:28,668 --> 00:19:29,751
No, I don't.

310
00:19:29,877 --> 00:19:31,253
Yes, you do.

311
00:19:32,255 --> 00:19:33,421
And I just tweeted that.

312
00:19:33,547 --> 00:19:35,340
- Dad!
- Howie, stop.

313
00:19:35,424 --> 00:19:38,593
Your dad's on the phone. Eat your dinner.

314
00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:40,345
Okay, thank you.

315
00:19:50,731 --> 00:19:52,065
What'd he say?

316
00:19:53,526 --> 00:19:57,195
Well, his secretary said
that he would recommend an attorney,

317
00:19:57,280 --> 00:19:59,948
but that he didn't wanna represent me.

318
00:20:00,283 --> 00:20:02,867
After all those years of business with him?

319
00:20:02,952 --> 00:20:03,994
Yeah.

320
00:20:04,078 --> 00:20:05,203
What about Jeffrey?

321
00:20:06,747 --> 00:20:09,082
Nobody's returning my calls.

322
00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:12,585
Has anyone seen my car keys?

323
00:20:13,254 --> 00:20:15,255
Mom, you don't drive anymore.

324
00:20:16,924 --> 00:20:18,008
Is it Hanukkah?

325
00:20:18,092 --> 00:20:19,509
No, it's not Hanukkah.

326
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:25,181
Yes, it is. That's why that nice young man
asked me to deliver this package to George.

327
00:20:26,017 --> 00:20:29,602
And it's a Iong drive,
and so I need my car keys.

328
00:20:30,396 --> 00:20:32,689
Mom, who gave you this?

329
00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:35,358
In the backyard,

330
00:20:35,443 --> 00:20:39,446
this man with a shiny, black suit
and black, shiny hair.

331
00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:51,082
George, there's a note.

332
00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:57,714
"You tock from me."

333
00:20:57,798 --> 00:20:59,299
"Take," honey. That says "take."

334
00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:01,968
No, I think that's "tock," honey. T-O-C-K.

335
00:21:02,053 --> 00:21:03,386
Just read it.

336
00:21:03,471 --> 00:21:05,722
Well, the man obviously
needs a spelling Iesson,

337
00:21:05,806 --> 00:21:07,057
not to mention his grammar.

338
00:21:07,141 --> 00:21:08,975
Can we open the present now?

339
00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:11,144
Mom, you know what? Let's not open this.

340
00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:12,312
No, this is ridiculous.

341
00:21:12,396 --> 00:21:13,563
Oh, my God!

342
00:21:14,648 --> 00:21:17,233
- It's a dead rat.
- I know.

343
00:21:17,318 --> 00:21:19,444
What does this mean?

344
00:21:20,237 --> 00:21:22,447
AII rats die.

345
00:21:24,784 --> 00:21:27,327
Oh, my God. George.

346
00:21:32,458 --> 00:21:37,128
Don't move. Just stay here, okay?

347
00:21:38,339 --> 00:21:39,756
Don't move.

348
00:21:41,175 --> 00:21:42,592
Stay here.

349
00:21:47,181 --> 00:21:48,264
George Needleman?

350
00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:49,724
Yes.

351
00:21:49,809 --> 00:21:52,018
FBI. You're under arrest.

352
00:21:52,103 --> 00:21:53,937
No!

353
00:21:58,692 --> 00:22:00,652
I can't believe this.

354
00:22:01,028 --> 00:22:04,989
You can't make bail.
Your accounts are frozen, George.

355
00:22:05,908 --> 00:22:08,326
Well, here's the thing.

356
00:22:09,620 --> 00:22:13,498
I haven't done anything wrong.
I just wanna go home.

357
00:22:13,582 --> 00:22:15,208
That's not gonna happen.

358
00:22:15,584 --> 00:22:17,627
The Malone family
is trying to kill you, George.

359
00:22:18,129 --> 00:22:21,506
We've been given orders
to keep you protected.

360
00:22:22,133 --> 00:22:23,425
What does that mean?

361
00:22:23,509 --> 00:22:25,552
It means you and your family
are coming with us.

362
00:22:29,807 --> 00:22:31,266
We have a problem with Needleman.

363
00:22:31,350 --> 00:22:32,517
What happened?

364
00:22:32,601 --> 00:22:33,643
I think Malone's boys know

365
00:22:33,727 --> 00:22:35,687
that we're gonna offer him a chance
to testify against them,

366
00:22:35,771 --> 00:22:36,855
so they sent their signature.

367
00:22:36,939 --> 00:22:38,064
Is he all right?

368
00:22:38,149 --> 00:22:39,816
Yeah, we're getting him out of there now.

369
00:22:40,109 --> 00:22:42,318
Good, I'll get on the phone
with the US Marshals right away...

370
00:22:42,403 --> 00:22:45,613
No, no. No, no. They can't go
into one of our regular safe houses.

371
00:22:46,323 --> 00:22:48,366
The Malones have penetrated
our guys before.

372
00:22:48,201 --> 00:22:51,162
We need to move him
to someplace safe now.

373
00:22:51,246 --> 00:22:53,414
Good idea. What do you suggest?

374
00:22:53,498 --> 00:22:55,583
I don't know,
but first thing tomorrow morning,

375
00:22:55,667 --> 00:22:56,834
they're on a plane headed here.

376
00:22:56,919 --> 00:23:00,379
You figure it out and tell no one.
Not even me.

377
00:23:01,924 --> 00:23:03,466
Sir, I've got kids at my house.

378
00:23:03,550 --> 00:23:05,176
I don't know what I would do
with a whole family of...

379
00:23:05,260 --> 00:23:07,678
I don't know. You've been
a prosecutor for over a year.

380
00:23:07,763 --> 00:23:10,932
This is a big case for you, Brian. Handle it.

381
00:23:12,703 --> 00:23:13,870
Yes, sir.

382
00:23:37,179 --> 00:23:38,429
Jake.

383
00:23:39,598 --> 00:23:40,848
What you doing here?

384
00:23:42,100 --> 00:23:45,061
You know, I'm just helping your auntie out.

385
00:23:45,312 --> 00:23:46,479
What'd you do?

386
00:23:46,563 --> 00:23:48,147
I tried to rob her.

387
00:23:48,231 --> 00:23:50,483
Boy, what is wrong with you?
I thought you gave up the gang banging.

388
00:23:50,567 --> 00:23:52,443
- What the hell?
- I'm in trouble.

389
00:23:52,527 --> 00:23:56,572
My dad put me in charge of
the church's mortgage payoff fundraiser.

390
00:23:56,656 --> 00:23:58,032
I think I may have Iost the money.

391
00:23:58,533 --> 00:23:59,533
How?

392
00:23:59,826 --> 00:24:02,828
I invested in some company,
and now they won't return my calls.

393
00:24:03,413 --> 00:24:04,538
Jake, come on, man.

394
00:24:04,623 --> 00:24:06,374
I know, and he's gonna kill me!

395
00:24:06,458 --> 00:24:07,833
He just wanted
to pay the church's mortgage off

396
00:24:07,918 --> 00:24:09,502
so that he could retire in peace.

397
00:24:09,586 --> 00:24:12,588
Look what I did. And he's so sick.

398
00:24:12,672 --> 00:24:16,092
I mean, those people at the church told him
not to make me trustee of the money.

399
00:24:16,176 --> 00:24:18,928
But you know what my dad did?
"What your dad did, Jake?"

400
00:24:19,012 --> 00:24:21,597
My dad went up there and told them
I was a changed man!

401
00:24:21,681 --> 00:24:22,765
You know what else he said?

402
00:24:22,849 --> 00:24:24,683
He said, "Everybody deserves
a second chance."

403
00:24:24,768 --> 00:24:26,227
- Calm down, man.
- You know? He said, "Everybody."

404
00:24:26,311 --> 00:24:27,395
- Jake. Jake.
- He did that for me.

405
00:24:27,479 --> 00:24:29,897
- And you know what?
- Hey, hey, hey.

406
00:24:29,981 --> 00:24:32,191
Calm down before Madea comes out
and slaps the hell out of you.

407
00:24:32,484 --> 00:24:36,946
Look, Brian, I need you to help me
get this money back from Lockwise.

408
00:24:37,030 --> 00:24:40,157
Lockwise Industries? New York?

409
00:24:40,242 --> 00:24:41,534
Yeah.

410
00:24:44,079 --> 00:24:46,288
That is a Ponzi scheme, man.

411
00:24:46,373 --> 00:24:48,833
I don't know how I can help you
get any money back from there.

412
00:24:48,917 --> 00:24:50,126
We're investigating them.

413
00:24:50,210 --> 00:24:53,462
A Iot of people invest in these companies,
and those guys Iive this Iavish Iifestyle.

414
00:24:53,547 --> 00:24:55,589
They spend all the money,
so there is no money.

415
00:24:55,674 --> 00:24:57,216
And whatever the government can find,

416
00:24:57,300 --> 00:25:00,428
maybe it's pennies on the dollar
that they can get back to the investors.

417
00:25:00,846 --> 00:25:02,680
I don't know how I can help you, man.

418
00:25:02,764 --> 00:25:06,517
Brian, I got to get this money back.

419
00:25:06,601 --> 00:25:07,935
How much money you talking?

420
00:25:09,771 --> 00:25:11,689
$114,000.

421
00:25:12,232 --> 00:25:16,569
You were robbing Madea? Madea doesn't
have that kind of money. What were you...

422
00:25:17,571 --> 00:25:20,739
Jake, don't tell me you were gonna rob
a bunch of old women.

423
00:25:20,824 --> 00:25:25,744
How many Iittle old Iadies you think
you gonna have to rob to get $114,000?

424
00:25:25,829 --> 00:25:29,039
114,000.

425
00:25:29,124 --> 00:25:31,333
Boy, get your ass off my porch
and go home!

426
00:25:31,418 --> 00:25:32,835
Yes, ma'am!

427
00:25:34,713 --> 00:25:36,755
Help me get this money back.

428
00:25:38,508 --> 00:25:40,801
Oh, man. Auntie Madea, man.

429
00:25:41,595 --> 00:25:42,595
What am I doing?

430
00:25:42,971 --> 00:25:44,930
Hey, hey, Madea.

431
00:25:45,765 --> 00:25:47,141
Hey, Brian. Hey, Brian.

432
00:25:47,476 --> 00:25:48,559
Hey.

433
00:25:48,643 --> 00:25:49,894
I don't know why the hell
you go in the bathroom

434
00:25:49,978 --> 00:25:51,187
and Ieave the toilet seat up, Mabel.

435
00:25:51,271 --> 00:25:52,646
Hey, Daddy.

436
00:25:52,731 --> 00:25:54,106
Do I know you?

437
00:25:55,192 --> 00:25:57,318
I'm past 18 now. You can stop pretending
Iike you don't know me,

438
00:25:57,402 --> 00:25:58,486
so you don't have to pay child support.

439
00:25:58,570 --> 00:26:01,572
Hey, son. How you doing?
I Iove you so much. So good to see you.

440
00:26:01,656 --> 00:26:03,491
You want something to eat?
I'm making a sandwich for Joe.

441
00:26:03,575 --> 00:26:06,827
I wouldn't eat that, son.
I wouldn't eat that at all.

442
00:26:06,912 --> 00:26:09,663
I believe she be trying to kill me
for my insurance money.

443
00:26:09,748 --> 00:26:11,749
You ain't got no insurance money.

444
00:26:12,209 --> 00:26:15,002
In that case, I'm gonna eat this sandwich
she done made.

445
00:26:15,086 --> 00:26:16,670
I'm not trying to kill you
for no insurance money.

446
00:26:16,755 --> 00:26:17,755
I'm gonna kill you 'cause I want you dead.

447
00:26:17,881 --> 00:26:19,256
I just want you completely dead.

448
00:26:19,382 --> 00:26:23,427
Just no Iife in you at all. Just not breathing.
Just maggot food.

449
00:26:24,763 --> 00:26:26,847
Here, son, try to taste that for me.

450
00:26:26,932 --> 00:26:29,266
Hey, I'm not tasting that. Thank you.

451
00:26:29,684 --> 00:26:31,435
What you doing here, son? What you want?

452
00:26:32,103 --> 00:26:33,938
Well, I wanted to talk to you, Madea. I have...

453
00:26:34,064 --> 00:26:35,523
You want some money or something?
I ain't got no money.

454
00:26:35,607 --> 00:26:37,441
You don't need to be coming over here
asking me for no money.

455
00:26:37,567 --> 00:26:39,401
Daddy, I didn't ask you for any money.

456
00:26:40,362 --> 00:26:41,779
Good. Then Ioan me some,

457
00:26:41,863 --> 00:26:44,949
'cause I need a Iittle change
for my Friday night Iights.

458
00:26:45,033 --> 00:26:46,450
What are you talking about?

459
00:26:46,535 --> 00:26:51,205
I be running them hoes, dawg.
I be running them hoes.

460
00:26:51,957 --> 00:26:53,457
Shut up, fool.

461
00:26:54,042 --> 00:26:56,710
I ain't got no money either, Brian.
What you want? What you come by here for?

462
00:26:56,795 --> 00:26:58,712
Well, I came by with a proposition.

463
00:26:58,797 --> 00:27:01,048
I just thought, you know,
you might wanna make a Iittle extra money.

464
00:27:01,132 --> 00:27:02,633
You know, the Iast time a man told me

465
00:27:02,717 --> 00:27:04,969
he had an opportunity for me
to make a Iittle money,

466
00:27:05,095 --> 00:27:08,556
I ended up in Mexico,
chained to 20 other women,

467
00:27:08,640 --> 00:27:10,891
walking down the street, just selling myself.

468
00:27:10,976 --> 00:27:12,560
You do need some money, don't you?

469
00:27:12,644 --> 00:27:14,061
Yeah, I could always use
a Iittle bit of money.

470
00:27:14,145 --> 00:27:15,479
Hell, things been tight around here.

471
00:27:15,605 --> 00:27:18,065
I was even thinking about
going back to my old job.

472
00:27:18,817 --> 00:27:20,484
- Stripping?
- No.

473
00:27:20,569 --> 00:27:22,152
- Hooking?
- No.

474
00:27:22,237 --> 00:27:23,988
- Robbing?
- No.

475
00:27:24,489 --> 00:27:26,782
- Hit man?
- No.

476
00:27:28,535 --> 00:27:29,535
Slinging?

477
00:27:30,203 --> 00:27:31,370
No.

478
00:27:32,038 --> 00:27:33,747
I did have some hustle
back in my day, though.

479
00:27:33,832 --> 00:27:37,209
I was doing a thing.
I was doing a thing back then.

480
00:27:37,335 --> 00:27:38,919
I done got the better now.

481
00:27:39,004 --> 00:27:42,172
Good those days are over here,
'cause you too big to be on a pole, Mabel.

482
00:27:42,299 --> 00:27:45,217
I'm gonna tell you right now about that pole.
You know, they done switched them.

483
00:27:45,343 --> 00:27:46,343
When you was back there dancing,

484
00:27:46,469 --> 00:27:48,387
they had them telephone poles
you used to swing on.

485
00:27:48,513 --> 00:27:50,723
Now, they got them Iittle brass poles.
I seen them.

486
00:27:50,849 --> 00:27:52,308
You'd bend or broke one of them.
You'll bend it.

487
00:27:52,392 --> 00:27:54,310
Your big ass'll break that brass.

488
00:27:54,394 --> 00:27:56,937
Big ass and brass don't mix.

489
00:27:57,022 --> 00:28:00,983
Joe, shut up, please. Just die.
Stop breathing. Okay? Stop breathing.

490
00:28:01,067 --> 00:28:04,153
I'm talking about going back to work
at an old folks' home where I used to work.

491
00:28:04,237 --> 00:28:06,322
No, no, you don't have to do that.
I got a great idea.

492
00:28:07,741 --> 00:28:09,575
AII right, here's the situation.

493
00:28:09,701 --> 00:28:12,036
I've got five people
that are in a Iittle bit of trouble.

494
00:28:12,162 --> 00:28:13,954
One of them is a witness
on a case that I'm working on.

495
00:28:14,039 --> 00:28:16,332
And I was wondering
if they could stay here for a while.

496
00:28:16,416 --> 00:28:19,752
Just for a couple of months
until the trial is over, maybe?

497
00:28:19,878 --> 00:28:21,712
Here? No.

498
00:28:21,838 --> 00:28:23,589
You better shut that up now.
Ain't nobody coming up in here.

499
00:28:23,715 --> 00:28:24,715
Hell to the no. Ain't nobody...

500
00:28:24,841 --> 00:28:27,176
You better hush that up now.
Ain't nobody coming up in here.

501
00:28:27,510 --> 00:28:28,636
- Daddy.
- What?

502
00:28:28,720 --> 00:28:30,054
No, that's just crazy.

503
00:28:30,180 --> 00:28:35,392
Have some criminal up in this house,
Iooking all crazy, and police Iooking...

504
00:28:35,518 --> 00:28:39,938
Hell, that's how Mabel Iive every day,
ain't it? That's your Iife.

505
00:28:40,065 --> 00:28:41,065
Shut up, rectum.

506
00:28:41,566 --> 00:28:43,400
Go to hell.

507
00:28:45,143 --> 00:28:46,310
Is somebody after them?

508
00:28:47,354 --> 00:28:48,521
Yes, ma'am.

509
00:28:48,605 --> 00:28:53,025
But, wait a minute.
I would not ask you to do this.

510
00:28:53,110 --> 00:28:55,278
You're my aunt. I know they'll be safe here.

511
00:28:55,362 --> 00:28:58,614
Not one person would know they're here.
This is the safest place for them.

512
00:28:58,740 --> 00:29:01,701
That's some bull.
He's trying to sell you a Ioad of bull.

513
00:29:02,452 --> 00:29:04,203
- What'd they do?
- I can't tell you that.

514
00:29:04,288 --> 00:29:06,581
But I can tell you this. I can tell you this.

515
00:29:06,707 --> 00:29:11,794
You know, you, you pack. You know?
Ain't nobody gonna mess with you.

516
00:29:11,920 --> 00:29:13,045
And this is the safest place for them.

517
00:29:13,130 --> 00:29:16,799
You could be Iike their
witness protector, Madea.

518
00:29:17,593 --> 00:29:19,885
Look here, don't be trying
to butter me up and all that stuff.

519
00:29:19,970 --> 00:29:21,637
I see what you're trying to butter me up.

520
00:29:21,763 --> 00:29:23,306
Yeah, I know I'm packing.

521
00:29:23,432 --> 00:29:26,475
I know I can hold some things down,
but, no, I don't want nobody up in here.

522
00:29:26,602 --> 00:29:27,810
I'm sorry. Absolutely not.

523
00:29:27,936 --> 00:29:30,563
I cannot do that. You're gonna have to find
somewhere else for them to go.

524
00:29:30,647 --> 00:29:33,566
The answer's a flat-out no,
and I am not changing my mind.

525
00:29:33,650 --> 00:29:36,152
My no mean "no," my yes mean "yes."

526
00:29:36,236 --> 00:29:38,404
And my "maybe" mean "get the hell out."
I'm sorry.

527
00:29:38,488 --> 00:29:41,824
Absolutely not. Flat-out no.
Ain't gonna happen. Get on out of here. No.

528
00:29:41,950 --> 00:29:43,576
Too bad, then.

529
00:29:43,660 --> 00:29:47,330
I'll just tell my boss we'll have to find
somewhere else for them to stay.

530
00:29:48,457 --> 00:29:51,626
Guess some other Iucky person
will make that $4,000 a month.

531
00:29:52,169 --> 00:29:54,003
You know what?

532
00:29:54,129 --> 00:29:57,256
I believe it would be the greatest
Christianity thing I could do

533
00:29:57,341 --> 00:29:58,507
to help somebody in need.

534
00:29:58,592 --> 00:30:01,510
So I'm gonna go ahead
and make up these sheets and clean up.

535
00:30:01,595 --> 00:30:04,513
Mabel, you know, I believe I'm gonna go
drag that cot out of that garage.

536
00:30:04,598 --> 00:30:06,849
I got a cot back there,
and we can put a sheet up in my room.

537
00:30:06,975 --> 00:30:10,353
We could share, make sure we got
enough room for everybody up in here.

538
00:30:10,479 --> 00:30:11,687
So is that a yes?

539
00:30:11,813 --> 00:30:14,023
Ain't nothing wrong with that cot.
Ain't nothing wrong with it at all.

540
00:30:14,149 --> 00:30:17,276
Got a Iittle mold growing in it, but that's
all right. As Iong as you don't breathe...

541
00:30:55,565 --> 00:30:57,149
Where the hell are we?

542
00:30:57,234 --> 00:30:58,818
Honey, we are in the South.

543
00:30:58,902 --> 00:30:59,985
Yes, ma'am.

544
00:31:00,070 --> 00:31:03,739
And it brings back pretty fond memories.

545
00:31:03,824 --> 00:31:04,907
Of what, Grams?

546
00:31:05,575 --> 00:31:08,577
A boat and a man, and...

547
00:31:08,662 --> 00:31:11,247
My, he had such a big...

548
00:31:13,834 --> 00:31:15,084
Boat.

549
00:31:16,753 --> 00:31:19,004
Hi. George?

550
00:31:19,756 --> 00:31:22,091
Yes, I'm George,

551
00:31:22,217 --> 00:31:26,929
and this is my daughter, Cindy,
and my wife, Kate, and my son, Howie,

552
00:31:27,055 --> 00:31:29,014
- and my mother, Barbara.
- Hi, how are you?

553
00:31:30,434 --> 00:31:32,518
The man in the boat.

554
00:31:39,276 --> 00:31:41,026
Don't have a clue.

555
00:31:43,739 --> 00:31:45,406
Cute man.

556
00:31:48,285 --> 00:31:49,618
Well, I'm Brian Simmons,

557
00:31:49,703 --> 00:31:52,204
and I just want all of you to know
you're gonna be in safe hands, okay?

558
00:31:52,289 --> 00:31:53,456
I'm a federal prosecutor,

559
00:31:53,540 --> 00:31:55,541
and we have a very safe place for you
and the entire family.

560
00:32:03,008 --> 00:32:04,300
Well, here we go, kids.

561
00:32:04,509 --> 00:32:05,551
This way, ma'am.

562
00:32:05,635 --> 00:32:06,969
Place Iooks haunted.

563
00:32:09,931 --> 00:32:11,265
Is this neighborhood safe?

564
00:32:12,267 --> 00:32:14,518
- It's very safe.
- Okay.

565
00:32:14,644 --> 00:32:18,272
There's no safer place
for you and your family. Trust me.

566
00:32:21,318 --> 00:32:23,444
This is not a hotel.

567
00:32:25,822 --> 00:32:28,991
Okay, Madea's gonna Iove this one.

568
00:32:34,331 --> 00:32:35,664
Madea?

569
00:32:36,833 --> 00:32:38,167
How's my favorite aunt, Madea?

570
00:32:39,544 --> 00:32:40,795
That Brian? Come on in.

571
00:32:41,171 --> 00:32:43,464
The family's here
that I was telling you about.

572
00:33:00,357 --> 00:33:01,649
Hello.

573
00:33:06,738 --> 00:33:09,198
Brian, what the hell's going on?

574
00:33:09,324 --> 00:33:12,743
Madea, this is the family
that I was telling you about.

575
00:33:16,248 --> 00:33:19,542
You forgot to mention one Iittle
important thing about this family.

576
00:33:21,169 --> 00:33:22,336
What's that?

577
00:33:25,382 --> 00:33:27,216
Don't play with me.

578
00:33:28,385 --> 00:33:30,386
Madea, these are the Needlemans,

579
00:33:30,512 --> 00:33:32,638
and they'll be staying with you
for a few months.

580
00:33:32,722 --> 00:33:34,723
What? Months?

581
00:33:35,392 --> 00:33:37,601
Are you joking? What, is he joking?

582
00:33:37,727 --> 00:33:38,853
Cindy.

583
00:33:38,937 --> 00:33:41,230
Dad, I can't stay here.

584
00:33:41,731 --> 00:33:43,315
What, are we sharecroppers now?

585
00:33:43,400 --> 00:33:45,359
Honey, not nice.

586
00:33:45,443 --> 00:33:47,444
Hi, I'm George.

587
00:33:47,571 --> 00:33:49,363
And I'm his mother, Barbara.

588
00:33:49,447 --> 00:33:52,241
And I'm his wife, Kate,
and these are our kids, Howie and Cindy.

589
00:33:52,367 --> 00:33:54,994
I'm his child. I'm not her daughter.

590
00:33:55,078 --> 00:33:56,412
Dad, I can't stay here.

591
00:33:56,788 --> 00:33:59,081
You know, I think it's kind of nice here.

592
00:33:59,207 --> 00:34:00,749
- I Iike it.
- Yeah, you would, you moron.

593
00:34:00,876 --> 00:34:03,085
- Would you...
- This is great. Just great.

594
00:34:04,212 --> 00:34:06,088
- Honey.
- Yeah, "vacation" my ass.

595
00:34:06,590 --> 00:34:08,090
Hello, trip from hell.

596
00:34:13,096 --> 00:34:16,056
Okay. Look here,

597
00:34:17,058 --> 00:34:20,519
would y'all go on into the Iiving room
and have a seat, please?

598
00:34:20,604 --> 00:34:24,148
I would Iike to talk to my nephew
in private just a moment.

599
00:34:24,274 --> 00:34:25,649
Thank you so much for...

600
00:34:25,775 --> 00:34:28,319
It's gonna be so Iovely
having all of y'all here.

601
00:34:28,445 --> 00:34:31,196
Yes, just wonderful. Wonderful.

602
00:34:31,281 --> 00:34:33,115
We'll be right in.

603
00:34:41,499 --> 00:34:43,834
- What did you do that for?
- What the hell wrong with you?

604
00:34:44,586 --> 00:34:47,463
You done brought these folks up
in this house. What is wrong with you?

605
00:34:48,298 --> 00:34:50,883
Madea, Iisten. Okay,
I know that they're not African-American.

606
00:34:50,967 --> 00:34:52,760
I don't care nothing
about the color of their skin.

607
00:34:52,844 --> 00:34:55,763
I wanna know how in the hell
I'm supposed to hide five white folks

608
00:34:55,847 --> 00:34:58,682
in a neighborhood where we ain't even got
white cats or white cars.

609
00:34:58,808 --> 00:35:01,226
Ain't nothing white around here.
If the police come in this neighborhood,

610
00:35:01,311 --> 00:35:03,520
they don't even come in a white car.
They send a black SUV.

611
00:35:03,647 --> 00:35:07,900
I understand, but Iisten, Iisten.
I know that you can figure it out.

612
00:35:07,984 --> 00:35:08,984
I know you'll work it out.

613
00:35:09,069 --> 00:35:13,864
Boy, hear me clearly and good
when I say this to you.

614
00:35:13,990 --> 00:35:16,659
Son, I don't know how to hide these people.

615
00:35:16,743 --> 00:35:20,996
You can do it. $4,000 a month. $4,000.

616
00:35:21,665 --> 00:35:22,665
You ain't Iistening to me, son.

617
00:35:22,749 --> 00:35:24,792
These people are gonna stick out
around here

618
00:35:24,876 --> 00:35:27,544
Iike I would stick out
at a Republica Convention.

619
00:35:27,671 --> 00:35:31,006
Do I Iook Iike I'm a Newt Ginger fan?
Do I Iook Iike I Iike Newt Gingery?

620
00:35:31,091 --> 00:35:34,885
Madea, okay, okay. But you'll figure it out.
I know you'll figure it out.

621
00:35:37,347 --> 00:35:39,181
Are we sitting on plastic?

622
00:35:39,891 --> 00:35:41,517
Mabel, I can't find the phone book.

623
00:35:41,601 --> 00:35:43,727
I'm trying to find somebody.
Where are the White Pages?

624
00:35:44,270 --> 00:35:45,938
My.

625
00:35:46,773 --> 00:35:48,691
The man in the boat.

626
00:35:51,361 --> 00:35:52,861
Hello.

627
00:35:57,242 --> 00:35:58,534
Hey.

628
00:36:12,048 --> 00:36:14,383
Mabel, they white folks.

629
00:36:14,926 --> 00:36:16,552
Really? I didn't notice.

630
00:36:17,429 --> 00:36:19,054
Come on. I'll introduce you.

631
00:36:21,224 --> 00:36:25,894
Needleman family, this is my father, Joe.
You already met my Aunt Madea.

632
00:36:28,314 --> 00:36:33,569
Dad, this is Howie, Kate, George, Cindy,
and Barbara.

633
00:36:34,738 --> 00:36:37,781
It Iooks Iike she's undressing me
with her eyes.

634
00:36:40,618 --> 00:36:43,203
Now, I'm sure that the agents told you,
but I just want to reiterate.

635
00:36:43,288 --> 00:36:45,914
You can't have any contact with anyone
from your past as Iong as you're here.

636
00:36:45,999 --> 00:36:47,041
Do you understand?

637
00:36:47,125 --> 00:36:48,250
Dad?

638
00:36:48,585 --> 00:36:50,294
Honey, I'm sorry.

639
00:36:51,463 --> 00:36:53,297
This is crazy.

640
00:36:54,257 --> 00:36:55,924
You suck.

641
00:36:57,343 --> 00:36:59,053
Did she just say... I know she...

642
00:36:59,137 --> 00:37:00,804
Did that child just say
she sucked to her daddy?

643
00:37:00,930 --> 00:37:04,975
Lord, have mercy.
What generation is this? You can't...

644
00:37:05,602 --> 00:37:08,353
You better hurry up
and get them the hell out of here.

645
00:37:08,938 --> 00:37:10,981
Mabel gonna kill that Iittle girl.

646
00:37:11,066 --> 00:37:14,693
But, Cindy, this is only until the trial is over.
Isn't that right, Brian?

647
00:37:14,778 --> 00:37:17,321
Yes, just until the trial is over.

648
00:37:17,405 --> 00:37:19,239
I hate you.

649
00:37:19,866 --> 00:37:22,659
That girl says she hate him. Oh, Lord,
somebody gonna have to help me.

650
00:37:22,744 --> 00:37:24,870
God, help me. God, help me.

651
00:37:25,246 --> 00:37:27,748
George, I know it's been
a rough day for you, so I tell you what.

652
00:37:27,832 --> 00:37:30,084
I'll come by tomorrow morning about 9:00,
pick you up.

653
00:37:30,168 --> 00:37:32,294
We'll go to the office
and begin working on this case, okay?

654
00:37:34,422 --> 00:37:37,257
So, Madea, why don't you show your
house guests where they'll be staying?

655
00:37:37,342 --> 00:37:40,469
Yeah, go on and show them, Mabel.
I ain't trying to go up there with them.

656
00:37:40,553 --> 00:37:44,348
That one right there,
I don't Iike the way she's Iooking at me.

657
00:37:44,432 --> 00:37:47,434
Well, you can show me to the door.
I'm getting back on that plane.

658
00:37:47,519 --> 00:37:48,852
- Honey.
- Excuse us.

659
00:37:48,937 --> 00:37:51,605
- You don't talk Iike that. Watch your mouth.
- Are you kidding me? Seriously.

660
00:37:51,689 --> 00:37:52,898
Your ass trying to get me a case.

661
00:37:52,982 --> 00:37:54,817
That's what you trying to do.
You're trying to get me a case.

662
00:37:55,527 --> 00:37:58,529
Better get a speedy trial.
I'm gonna tell you that right now.

663
00:37:59,489 --> 00:38:01,490
I'll get a speedy trial.

664
00:38:05,954 --> 00:38:07,663
What's happening to us?

665
00:38:08,706 --> 00:38:11,416
Kate, if I'd known

666
00:38:11,501 --> 00:38:14,920
that taking care of my family
would Iead us to this, I would've...

667
00:38:15,004 --> 00:38:17,798
This wasn't about family.
This was about you.

668
00:38:17,882 --> 00:38:20,259
We have way more than we needed.

669
00:38:21,469 --> 00:38:23,804
This was about greed.

670
00:38:23,888 --> 00:38:25,347
You know, sweetheart,

671
00:38:25,431 --> 00:38:29,935
I seem to recall you were very happy
with my promotion, too.

672
00:38:30,019 --> 00:38:31,436
What were you thinking?

673
00:38:32,772 --> 00:38:37,442
I don't know.
I wasn't even aware this was going on.

674
00:38:37,527 --> 00:38:40,779
You're not aware
of a Iot of things going on now.

675
00:38:42,866 --> 00:38:45,033
- Kate...
- I don't wanna talk about this.

676
00:38:45,118 --> 00:38:47,578
I'm gonna unpack my bag and go to sleep.

677
00:38:47,662 --> 00:38:50,247
We're done. It's done.

678
00:38:52,333 --> 00:38:54,960
It's gonna end just Iike that?

679
00:38:55,044 --> 00:38:56,503
Come on, man. Don't Iet her pimp you.

680
00:38:56,588 --> 00:38:58,755
She wanna go to sleep? Knock her ass out.

681
00:38:59,132 --> 00:39:02,092
Joe, shut the hell up.
They're having a private conversation

682
00:39:02,177 --> 00:39:04,678
in a room about not being aware
of what's going on.

683
00:39:04,762 --> 00:39:06,763
If he ain't aware,
that is between the two of them.

684
00:39:06,848 --> 00:39:09,808
Shut up. Let them have
their private moment, please.

685
00:39:09,893 --> 00:39:13,562
When a door is closed, that mean
you ain't supposed to be Iistening.

686
00:39:13,646 --> 00:39:16,064
Leave them people alone. Shut the hell up.

687
00:39:16,149 --> 00:39:18,025
- Mabel, you shut up.
- No, you shut the hell up.

688
00:39:18,109 --> 00:39:20,152
Mabel, I'm older than you.
I'll do whatever the hell I want to do.

689
00:39:20,236 --> 00:39:21,737
Yeah, it's my house.
You gonna shut up up in here

690
00:39:21,821 --> 00:39:23,697
or I'm gonna come up and
cut your vocal cords out.

691
00:39:23,781 --> 00:39:25,282
You ain't gonna be able to say
a damn thing!

692
00:39:25,491 --> 00:39:26,491
Good night.

693
00:39:39,714 --> 00:39:41,256
What the hell?

694
00:39:43,635 --> 00:39:45,677
Boy! Boy!

695
00:39:50,183 --> 00:39:51,850
Is that you farting, son?

696
00:39:52,727 --> 00:39:54,478
It wasn't me.

697
00:39:55,396 --> 00:39:56,897
Fart one more time.
That's all I'm gonna tell you.

698
00:39:56,981 --> 00:39:58,774
Fart one more time.

699
00:40:00,318 --> 00:40:02,319
In here farting Iike that.

700
00:40:03,071 --> 00:40:06,198
What's wrong with you, boy?
That's doggone insane.

701
00:40:06,282 --> 00:40:08,075
Hello, Joe.

702
00:40:08,743 --> 00:40:10,786
You wanna give it a go?

703
00:40:12,664 --> 00:40:14,373
Mabel.

704
00:40:16,084 --> 00:40:19,670
Mabel, they trying to get me.

705
00:40:20,838 --> 00:40:22,506
No, no, trying to get me

706
00:40:22,590 --> 00:40:25,550
Iike they get them football players
and them basketball players.

707
00:40:25,635 --> 00:40:29,930
I don't think so. No, no, no.

708
00:40:30,014 --> 00:40:31,515
I won't bite.

709
00:40:51,452 --> 00:40:53,954
Lord, Lord, Lord.

710
00:40:57,166 --> 00:40:58,709
You staring at me?

711
00:41:00,670 --> 00:41:04,298
No, no, I wasn't staring at you.

712
00:41:04,382 --> 00:41:05,590
Okay.

713
00:41:06,426 --> 00:41:09,594
I was watching the wildebeest
in its natural habitat, though.

714
00:41:09,679 --> 00:41:11,346
Excuse me?

715
00:41:14,851 --> 00:41:16,018
That's not nice.

716
00:41:16,102 --> 00:41:20,355
Yeah. Her butt must be hungry,
'cause it's chewing that dress alive.

717
00:41:23,067 --> 00:41:26,737
If you need anything, anything at all,

718
00:41:28,448 --> 00:41:30,866
I'm just a whisper away.

719
00:41:30,950 --> 00:41:32,743
AII you got to do is whisper.

720
00:41:37,623 --> 00:41:39,750
Okay, I think I'm done.

721
00:41:40,460 --> 00:41:42,586
Where you rushing off to?

722
00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:46,048
- Yoga's over.
- Okay.

723
00:41:46,132 --> 00:41:47,215
Creepy.

724
00:41:47,300 --> 00:41:48,633
- Hi.
- How you doing?

725
00:41:48,718 --> 00:41:50,969
- I'm good. Thank you.
- I see you was up in there doing that yoda.

726
00:41:51,054 --> 00:41:53,388
It's yoga.

727
00:41:53,473 --> 00:41:55,515
No, baby, I don't have no yogurt.
I don't eat that.

728
00:41:55,600 --> 00:41:59,061
That mess my stomach up.
It's got that abiffidus bacalarus in it.

729
00:41:59,145 --> 00:42:01,146
I can't have that. So you go on
and get yourself something else.

730
00:42:01,230 --> 00:42:03,982
I might have some in that fridge there,
but I don't eat it.

731
00:42:04,067 --> 00:42:05,275
Well, it Iooks Iike you've been cooking.

732
00:42:05,401 --> 00:42:07,527
Yeah, I wanted to feed your family
their first day in my house.

733
00:42:07,612 --> 00:42:09,905
I wanted to make sure
y'all had something really good to eat.

734
00:42:09,989 --> 00:42:14,743
So I got some waffles, some biscuits,
I got some pancakes, I got some bacon,

735
00:42:14,827 --> 00:42:16,745
I got ham. I put a Iot of butter on the ham,

736
00:42:16,829 --> 00:42:18,663
a Iot of salt and pepper,
make it nice and flavorful.

737
00:42:18,748 --> 00:42:20,040
I got oatmeal on the stove.

738
00:42:20,124 --> 00:42:21,416
I got sausage,

739
00:42:21,501 --> 00:42:24,002
and I got eggs and grits and everything else.

740
00:42:24,087 --> 00:42:25,921
Y'all betterjust feast.

741
00:42:28,007 --> 00:42:29,591
It Iooks so good.

742
00:42:29,675 --> 00:42:32,552
It's a Iot of carbs. You Iike carbs?

743
00:42:32,637 --> 00:42:33,970
- It's a Iot of...
- Carbs.

744
00:42:34,097 --> 00:42:36,181
No, baby, I don't eat crabs.
You can't eat no crabs.

745
00:42:36,265 --> 00:42:39,017
You gonna have crabs and yogurt?
You about to mess your stomach up.

746
00:42:39,102 --> 00:42:41,353
Ain't no seafood on here, honey.
I'm allergic to seafood.

747
00:42:41,437 --> 00:42:42,771
Ain't no seafood here nowhere.

748
00:42:42,855 --> 00:42:44,606
Is that how you stay so thin?

749
00:42:44,690 --> 00:42:47,234
No, honey, I don't eat that stuff.
Where your family?

750
00:42:47,318 --> 00:42:49,403
They're sleeping still.

751
00:42:49,487 --> 00:42:52,155
What? They got to get up.

752
00:42:52,698 --> 00:42:55,826
No, baby, your children got to go to school.
I got to get them registered,

753
00:42:55,952 --> 00:42:58,412
and George is supposed to see Brian
down at the attorney's office.

754
00:42:58,496 --> 00:43:00,288
So, no, no, no, you got to get them up.

755
00:43:00,373 --> 00:43:03,041
Okay, well, I was just gonna Iet...
You know, they're so exhausted.

756
00:43:03,126 --> 00:43:05,377
- No, I'll go get them up. Here, you take this.
- Okay.

757
00:43:05,461 --> 00:43:06,670
Take this and stir that real good.

758
00:43:06,796 --> 00:43:08,839
- Whip it real, real good. You understand?
- Yeah, I understand.

759
00:43:08,965 --> 00:43:10,966
AII right, you need to put something... Here.

760
00:43:11,050 --> 00:43:12,801
Here, put this on.
Put this on while you whip.

761
00:43:12,885 --> 00:43:14,386
- You don't wanna get that on you.
- Okay. No.

762
00:43:14,470 --> 00:43:15,679
- Put that on. Okay, whip it.
- Thank you.

763
00:43:15,805 --> 00:43:17,848
- Whip it real good.
- I will.

764
00:43:23,062 --> 00:43:25,647
George, get up out this bed, son.

765
00:43:30,069 --> 00:43:31,236
Kate.

766
00:43:32,655 --> 00:43:34,990
I had this horrible dream

767
00:43:35,324 --> 00:43:38,785
that we were in trouble with the FBI,

768
00:43:38,870 --> 00:43:42,831
and we moved into this house
with an old woman who Iooked Iike...

769
00:43:44,417 --> 00:43:45,500
Like what?

770
00:43:46,586 --> 00:43:47,711
You.

771
00:43:48,754 --> 00:43:52,382
It's not a dream. It's really happening.

772
00:43:52,842 --> 00:43:54,551
I'm in so deep.

773
00:43:56,888 --> 00:44:00,015
George, you need to get up out this bed.
Brian is waiting for you down at the office.

774
00:44:00,099 --> 00:44:01,808
He said he was gonna have you
come down there this morning.

775
00:44:01,893 --> 00:44:03,643
Now, get up on out this bed.

776
00:44:03,728 --> 00:44:06,897
My Iife is over.
I'm not getting out of this bed.

777
00:44:07,023 --> 00:44:09,232
There's no reason to get out of this bed.

778
00:44:09,358 --> 00:44:12,736
You need a reason? You need a reason?

779
00:44:14,947 --> 00:44:17,449
You better get your ass out this bed.

780
00:44:22,079 --> 00:44:24,456
Is that enough reason for you?

781
00:44:24,540 --> 00:44:25,624
Let me tell you something, son.

782
00:44:25,708 --> 00:44:28,710
I don't allow nobody to feel sorry
for themselves in my house.

783
00:44:28,794 --> 00:44:30,587
I don't know what you did.
I don't care what you did.

784
00:44:30,713 --> 00:44:31,713
Do you understand?

785
00:44:31,797 --> 00:44:33,381
I need you to get up out this bed,
come downstairs,

786
00:44:33,466 --> 00:44:36,301
have breakfast with your family,
Brian is waiting on you down at the office

787
00:44:36,385 --> 00:44:37,719
to talk about
whatever y'all need to talk about.

788
00:44:37,803 --> 00:44:41,181
It ain't my business. I don't wanna know,
but you gonna get up out this bed.

789
00:44:41,265 --> 00:44:43,141
If I come back up these stairs,
and you still in this bed,

790
00:44:43,226 --> 00:44:44,851
do you have any idea what I'm gonna do?

791
00:44:44,936 --> 00:44:48,230
I'm gonna get completely naked,
and get up in there with you and spoon.

792
00:44:49,440 --> 00:44:50,690
I'm up.

793
00:44:50,775 --> 00:44:51,775
Thank you.

794
00:44:51,901 --> 00:44:55,153
I am definitely up.
You don't have to come back.

795
00:44:55,238 --> 00:44:58,615
I'm coming right down.
I'm coming right down.

796
00:45:00,451 --> 00:45:02,077
I'm on my way.

797
00:45:13,214 --> 00:45:14,256
Get up, son.

798
00:45:17,093 --> 00:45:18,134
What's wrong?

799
00:45:19,095 --> 00:45:20,887
You just scared me.

800
00:45:20,972 --> 00:45:25,267
You're just so huge.
Like a giant bag of Skittles.

801
00:45:26,727 --> 00:45:29,020
AII right, you better get the hell up,

802
00:45:29,105 --> 00:45:30,939
or when I come back up in here,
you know what's gonna happen?

803
00:45:31,065 --> 00:45:33,441
You gonna taste the rainbow.

804
00:45:33,464 --> 00:45:35,506
- Now, get up.
- I'm up. I'm up.

805
00:45:35,632 --> 00:45:38,843
Probably dreaming about Skittles
and Coca-Cola and Pepsi,

806
00:45:38,969 --> 00:45:41,304
diet soda and Mountain Dew
and Honey Buns,

807
00:45:41,388 --> 00:45:43,264
and damn Krispy Kreme and everything else.

808
00:45:43,348 --> 00:45:44,390
So you're up?

809
00:45:44,516 --> 00:45:48,019
There you are, Sadie.
You must iron the sheets.

810
00:45:48,145 --> 00:45:51,564
Mr. Needleman gets very angry
if there are any wrinkles.

811
00:45:54,193 --> 00:45:56,027
Honey, who the hell is Sadie?

812
00:45:56,153 --> 00:45:58,154
Don't you use that kind of Ianguage with me.

813
00:45:58,238 --> 00:46:01,657
'Cause I'll have you fired.
Do you understand?

814
00:46:01,742 --> 00:46:04,577
Mrs. Needleman. Okay, I get it.

815
00:46:04,703 --> 00:46:08,706
The mall is open, but there
ain't nobody in there shopping.

816
00:46:10,500 --> 00:46:11,626
What's that smell?

817
00:46:11,710 --> 00:46:14,212
It's called food. I'm cooking.

818
00:46:14,338 --> 00:46:17,340
It smells up the whole house. It permeates.

819
00:46:17,424 --> 00:46:22,220
Thank you. You always were
the best colored help we could ever find.

820
00:46:24,556 --> 00:46:27,350
Okay, Brian playing a joke on me.

821
00:46:27,434 --> 00:46:30,811
I'm being Punk'd. I know I'm being Punk'd.
Where the camera at?

822
00:46:30,896 --> 00:46:32,855
Little girl, I need you to get up, honey.

823
00:46:32,940 --> 00:46:34,732
Go away.

824
00:46:40,280 --> 00:46:44,283
Never had no child talk to me
Iike this before. Lordy.

825
00:46:44,409 --> 00:46:48,287
Honey, I got to bring y'all down to school
and get you registered. Now, get up.

826
00:46:50,415 --> 00:46:52,208
I said, go away.

827
00:46:54,795 --> 00:46:57,922
She just yelled at me in my house.
I don't know what she...

828
00:46:58,048 --> 00:46:59,340
Little girl,
I'm gonna tell you one more time...

829
00:46:59,424 --> 00:47:01,467
I said, go away!

830
00:47:09,268 --> 00:47:11,060
I know she didn't just...

831
00:47:16,233 --> 00:47:18,234
Who the hell you think
you talking to?

832
00:47:20,237 --> 00:47:23,155
Oh, my God! What is wrong with you?

833
00:47:23,282 --> 00:47:25,324
This is my house.

834
00:47:25,450 --> 00:47:27,952
You Iive by my rules
when you are in my house.

835
00:47:28,078 --> 00:47:30,246
You're too young for that, Iittle girl.
You don't want none of this.

836
00:47:30,330 --> 00:47:34,333
Please, do yourself a favor, honey.
You do not want none of this.

837
00:47:34,459 --> 00:47:37,503
Behave while you're here. If not, you will...

838
00:47:40,966 --> 00:47:43,092
Girl, you...

839
00:47:43,176 --> 00:47:45,761
Girl, you just don't know...

840
00:47:49,516 --> 00:47:51,475
I don't know who she thinks
she's talking to.

841
00:47:51,810 --> 00:47:53,269
She's insane.

842
00:47:57,774 --> 00:47:58,774
Hello?

843
00:47:59,526 --> 00:48:00,693
Is that you, son?

844
00:48:03,322 --> 00:48:05,656
- Yes, sir.
- Well, come on in here.

845
00:48:08,118 --> 00:48:09,785
What are you doing here, Dad?

846
00:48:10,495 --> 00:48:12,663
Well, I'm feeling better, much better.

847
00:48:12,789 --> 00:48:16,834
No, you're not.
You're supposed to be at home in bed.

848
00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:21,005
I just had to stop by here
to make sure everything's all right.

849
00:48:21,506 --> 00:48:22,506
It's all fine.

850
00:48:23,008 --> 00:48:28,763
I've decided to tell the church
the third Sunday I'm retiring.

851
00:48:29,222 --> 00:48:31,223
I thought you were gonna wait
till summer to do that.

852
00:48:31,350 --> 00:48:34,769
No, I can't do that, son. I'm too tired.

853
00:48:34,853 --> 00:48:37,271
It'll sure make the burden so much easier

854
00:48:37,356 --> 00:48:42,318
to know that everything I've worked for
all these years is gonna be Iooked after.

855
00:48:42,402 --> 00:48:45,696
I am very proud of you, son.
Really proud of you.

856
00:48:47,032 --> 00:48:48,949
Don't be proud of me.

857
00:48:49,034 --> 00:48:51,577
Are you kidding me?
I have to tell you I'm proud of you.

858
00:48:51,703 --> 00:48:54,830
You know something?
After your mother died,

859
00:48:54,915 --> 00:48:56,207
I wasn't sure you were gonna make it.

860
00:48:57,250 --> 00:49:00,336
You were so far out there in those streets.

861
00:49:00,420 --> 00:49:02,254
But, praise the Lord, Iook at you now.

862
00:49:02,381 --> 00:49:07,009
Helping me run the church,
handling our mortgage payment fund.

863
00:49:07,094 --> 00:49:08,719
No, I am very proud of you, son.

864
00:49:09,137 --> 00:49:11,514
You know, the congregation
is gonna be a Iittle bit upset

865
00:49:11,598 --> 00:49:15,559
when I tell them that I'm retiring,
so to ease the pain,

866
00:49:15,644 --> 00:49:19,772
I'm going to tell them that we have raised
the money to pay off the church.

867
00:49:21,274 --> 00:49:23,025
They're gonna rejoice.

868
00:49:24,403 --> 00:49:25,861
Well done, son.

869
00:49:25,946 --> 00:49:27,279
Yes, sir.

870
00:49:36,581 --> 00:49:40,000
I don't see her out here. Y'all come on.
Come on. Hurry up.

871
00:49:40,085 --> 00:49:43,462
She always nosy as hell,
over there Iooking at everything.

872
00:49:43,547 --> 00:49:44,922
Hurry up.

873
00:49:49,970 --> 00:49:52,555
- Come on. Get in the car.
- Madea.

874
00:49:52,639 --> 00:49:53,806
Madea.

875
00:49:54,015 --> 00:49:55,141
Hey, Hattie.

876
00:49:56,101 --> 00:49:57,268
How you doing?

877
00:49:57,352 --> 00:49:58,644
- I'm good, baby.
- Open the door.

878
00:49:58,728 --> 00:50:01,355
- Come here a minute.
- I can't talk to you right now, honey.

879
00:50:01,440 --> 00:50:04,358
This my cousins, and they done Iost
all the pigmentation in their skin overnight.

880
00:50:04,443 --> 00:50:05,734
- Your cousins?
- Yes.

881
00:50:05,819 --> 00:50:06,819
Can I help you?

882
00:50:06,903 --> 00:50:09,321
No, I got to take them
to the doctor right now.

883
00:50:09,406 --> 00:50:11,615
I'll see you Iater on. Take care.

884
00:50:16,371 --> 00:50:18,122
And that's all you know?

885
00:50:18,206 --> 00:50:20,499
That's all I know. I swear it.

886
00:50:20,834 --> 00:50:22,126
I don't believe you.

887
00:50:23,211 --> 00:50:25,296
I'm telling you the truth.

888
00:50:25,714 --> 00:50:28,716
You're going to jail for a very Iong time.

889
00:50:34,431 --> 00:50:38,726
I can't go to jail. I didn't do anything wrong.

890
00:50:38,810 --> 00:50:41,187
George, calm down, okay?

891
00:50:41,855 --> 00:50:44,940
For what it's worth, I believe you.

892
00:50:45,942 --> 00:50:49,987
Oh, boy, somebody believes me.
Isn't that wonderful?

893
00:50:50,071 --> 00:50:54,617
Let's crack open some champagne,
because somebody believes me.

894
00:50:55,577 --> 00:50:57,495
Oh, God, I'm in trouble.

895
00:51:00,999 --> 00:51:05,503
I think they can believe you, too,
but you have to help me make them believe.

896
00:51:06,254 --> 00:51:10,424
Just tell me what you want me to do.

897
00:51:10,509 --> 00:51:13,302
What do I need to do here?

898
00:51:13,386 --> 00:51:16,138
Okay, that's a good attitude, George.
Really good attitude.

899
00:51:16,223 --> 00:51:19,099
Everything that wasn't shredded
or destroyed is in these files.

900
00:51:19,184 --> 00:51:23,270
This is your ticket to freedom.
You're the CFO. I'm sure you can find it.

901
00:51:24,022 --> 00:51:25,231
Okay, well,

902
00:51:25,482 --> 00:51:30,069
this is the crux of the problem here, Brian,

903
00:51:30,153 --> 00:51:35,282
because I can't seem to find anything
in here that will help.

904
00:51:35,367 --> 00:51:37,243
I wanna help you. I really do.

905
00:51:37,327 --> 00:51:41,580
It doesn't make any sense
for me not to wanna help.

906
00:51:41,665 --> 00:51:44,375
Now does it? Does it? No. No.

907
00:51:44,459 --> 00:51:47,920
I mean, don't you think
I would help if I could?

908
00:51:51,675 --> 00:51:53,551
- Are you okay?
- No, I just...

909
00:51:53,635 --> 00:51:56,512
I feel Iike I... I wanna hit something.

910
00:51:56,596 --> 00:51:58,430
Hit the chair. Hit something.

911
00:52:09,025 --> 00:52:10,067
I'm sorry.

912
00:52:25,917 --> 00:52:28,002
That was a Iovely evening.

913
00:52:29,921 --> 00:52:32,423
There ain't never been no evening, Iady.
I don't know you.

914
00:52:32,924 --> 00:52:36,844
Stop it. There's no one around.

915
00:52:36,928 --> 00:52:39,930
Read my Iips, honey. I don't know you.

916
00:52:40,890 --> 00:52:43,434
You're the man in the boat.

917
00:52:43,560 --> 00:52:45,603
I ain't never had no boat.

918
00:52:49,399 --> 00:52:53,193
I bet if I showed you my tattoo,
you might remember.

919
00:52:53,278 --> 00:52:56,071
What tattoo? What you fixing to show me?

920
00:53:00,952 --> 00:53:03,621
I believe you need to see a doctor
about that, honey.

921
00:53:03,705 --> 00:53:06,957
No, that's Betty Boop.

922
00:53:08,960 --> 00:53:13,047
It might have been Betty Boop at one time,
but Betty Boop done drooped.

923
00:53:13,131 --> 00:53:14,715
Betty Boop.

924
00:53:14,799 --> 00:53:17,468
You brought me over in your Iittle boat.

925
00:53:17,594 --> 00:53:22,806
Lady, for the Iast time, okay?
First of all, you insulted me.

926
00:53:22,891 --> 00:53:24,224
'Cause I wouldn't have a Iittle boat.

927
00:53:24,309 --> 00:53:26,727
I'm not a canoe kind of man.
You understand?

928
00:53:26,811 --> 00:53:30,564
I'm a yacht, a cruise ship,
Noah's Ark up in this piece.

929
00:53:30,649 --> 00:53:33,817
Only time I was ever in a boat was
that Iittle rowboat belonged to the Army

930
00:53:33,943 --> 00:53:35,819
when I was in New Orleans many years ago.

931
00:53:35,904 --> 00:53:39,073
I'd take people across the water
over there from the bayou to the juke joint,

932
00:53:39,157 --> 00:53:40,574
and I'd charge them a nickel
to get them over there.

933
00:53:40,659 --> 00:53:43,077
And they'd all take the ride and everything.
I'd give them their change.

934
00:53:43,161 --> 00:53:46,497
And somebody gave me a 50-cent tip
that night.

935
00:53:52,087 --> 00:53:53,587
You Barbara Betty Boop.

936
00:53:53,672 --> 00:53:57,508
Yes, I was a nurse in Company B.

937
00:53:59,511 --> 00:54:02,680
Yeah, I was in Company C
over there with the colored troops.

938
00:54:02,806 --> 00:54:06,517
Me and a couple of my girlfriends followed
you guys all the way to your barracks.

939
00:54:06,643 --> 00:54:09,019
Yeah, I remember it was four of you.

940
00:54:09,145 --> 00:54:15,442
It was Blanche, Rose, Dorothy, and you.

941
00:54:18,697 --> 00:54:20,280
I don't even know
how you remember that, honey.

942
00:54:20,365 --> 00:54:23,283
That was 56, 57 years ago.

943
00:54:23,368 --> 00:54:25,452
Fifty-three.

944
00:54:25,537 --> 00:54:27,663
Because George is 52.

945
00:54:30,041 --> 00:54:31,959
What that got to do with anything?

946
00:54:34,379 --> 00:54:36,630
What day is it?

947
00:54:37,132 --> 00:54:40,676
Lady, don't you start...
What you trying to tell me?

948
00:54:42,679 --> 00:54:44,054
Where am I?

949
00:54:44,139 --> 00:54:46,807
I think you believe you're trying
to tell me something about George.

950
00:54:46,891 --> 00:54:48,642
- Oh, my goodness.
- Hey.

951
00:54:48,727 --> 00:54:50,477
I don't know where I am.

952
00:54:56,901 --> 00:54:58,193
George?

953
00:55:02,073 --> 00:55:03,157
- Brian.
- Jake.

954
00:55:03,241 --> 00:55:05,075
You cannot keep calling me Iike this, man.

955
00:55:05,201 --> 00:55:07,035
I'm in the middle of an investigation.
What are you doing?

956
00:55:07,662 --> 00:55:10,914
My dad wants to announce that he's paying
the church's mortgage off in three weeks.

957
00:55:10,999 --> 00:55:12,583
I mean, what am I supposed to do?

958
00:55:12,709 --> 00:55:14,418
Tell him the truth.

959
00:55:14,544 --> 00:55:15,586
That will kill him.

960
00:55:15,670 --> 00:55:18,005
He'll be very happy
that you told him the truth.

961
00:55:18,089 --> 00:55:19,673
I can't. I can't do it.

962
00:55:19,758 --> 00:55:21,008
Jake.

963
00:55:21,092 --> 00:55:23,093
That's him. That's the dude from the news!

964
00:55:23,762 --> 00:55:25,012
I ought to kill you!

965
00:55:25,096 --> 00:55:27,431
- Who is this?
- I'm your worst nightmare.

966
00:55:27,557 --> 00:55:28,849
Will you just...

967
00:55:28,933 --> 00:55:32,936
You're my worst... I got news for you.
I'm Iiving my worst nightmare, okay?

968
00:55:33,062 --> 00:55:36,106
And besides, you're a Iittle short
to be a nightmare, aren't you?

969
00:55:36,191 --> 00:55:38,776
I'm short? He called me...
He called me short?

970
00:55:38,860 --> 00:55:40,444
I'm gonna bust your balls!

971
00:55:40,528 --> 00:55:43,947
Well, why don't you get in Iine
and bust my balls?

972
00:55:44,073 --> 00:55:46,533
Because everybody else is busting my balls.

973
00:55:46,618 --> 00:55:49,745
I don't have any balls Ieft, mister!
How about that?

974
00:55:50,246 --> 00:55:52,122
I'm gonna... Get off.

975
00:55:52,582 --> 00:55:54,875
Calm down. Nobody's kicking balls.

976
00:55:54,959 --> 00:55:57,252
George, Jake, I need you both to calm down.

977
00:55:57,337 --> 00:55:58,796
Is everything all right out there?

978
00:55:58,922 --> 00:56:00,130
Everything's fine.

979
00:56:02,258 --> 00:56:04,051
Just keep working. It's all good.

980
00:56:04,761 --> 00:56:06,804
George, this is Jake.

981
00:56:07,472 --> 00:56:10,891
His father has a church,
and they were gonna pay off their mortgage,

982
00:56:10,975 --> 00:56:14,812
and they invested the money in Lockwise,
and they Iost it all.

983
00:56:14,896 --> 00:56:16,897
So he's a Iittle bit upset.

984
00:56:16,981 --> 00:56:19,566
- I'm sorry.
- You...

985
00:56:20,985 --> 00:56:22,694
That's all you got to say? Is you sorry?

986
00:56:22,779 --> 00:56:24,196
- Jake.
- Hell...

987
00:56:24,280 --> 00:56:26,532
Yeah. Okay, okay.
You better watch yourself,

988
00:56:26,616 --> 00:56:27,866
or I'm gonna give you a...

989
00:56:27,951 --> 00:56:31,578
You see this? Big five. Big five.
And you're gonna get it.

990
00:56:31,663 --> 00:56:33,997
If I didn't have to go to the bathroom,
you'd be in...

991
00:56:34,082 --> 00:56:35,916
- Where's the bathroom, Brian?
- Okay.

992
00:56:36,000 --> 00:56:37,125
Third door on the Ieft.

993
00:56:37,210 --> 00:56:39,127
- Third door on the Ieft.
- Yeah.

994
00:56:40,046 --> 00:56:41,421
Big five?

995
00:56:42,715 --> 00:56:45,676
Jake, go home.

996
00:56:46,970 --> 00:56:49,721
Get a grip, okay? Tell him the truth.

997
00:56:50,181 --> 00:56:52,224
If anything comes up, I'll call you.

998
00:56:52,308 --> 00:56:55,269
Can't you just go home?
Elevator's right there.

999
00:57:05,154 --> 00:57:06,947
How tall are you, son?

1000
00:57:08,199 --> 00:57:11,034
About 6 feet.

1001
00:57:11,369 --> 00:57:13,161
- About 6 feet?
- Yeah.

1002
00:57:14,622 --> 00:57:16,790
Okay. Check.

1003
00:57:19,377 --> 00:57:21,128
You Iike soul music?

1004
00:57:23,548 --> 00:57:27,134
I do. I do. I Iove soul music.

1005
00:57:28,386 --> 00:57:29,720
R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

1006
00:57:29,846 --> 00:57:32,389
Find out what it mean to me.

1007
00:57:32,473 --> 00:57:34,308
No, I dig it.

1008
00:57:34,392 --> 00:57:36,810
You dig it. You dig it?

1009
00:57:38,897 --> 00:57:40,063
Check.

1010
00:57:45,403 --> 00:57:48,572
Your hair's really thick and curly.

1011
00:57:48,698 --> 00:57:51,158
Always been that thick and curly?

1012
00:57:51,242 --> 00:57:52,910
Yeah, it has.

1013
00:57:53,036 --> 00:57:55,829
When I was a kid, I had an afro that was,

1014
00:57:56,539 --> 00:57:59,583
you know, Iarge.

1015
00:58:00,001 --> 00:58:02,753
To here. Big, big hair.

1016
00:58:03,046 --> 00:58:06,465
No, you said it right. You had an afro.
You didn't offend me. You had an afro.

1017
00:58:06,549 --> 00:58:08,342
That's what you called it, an afro. Check.

1018
00:58:08,426 --> 00:58:09,843
An afro.

1019
00:58:13,514 --> 00:58:14,848
Can you swim, son?

1020
00:58:16,392 --> 00:58:18,685
No. No.

1021
00:58:18,770 --> 00:58:21,772
I never got the hang of swimming.

1022
00:58:22,774 --> 00:58:26,443
Never got the hang of it. Yup. Check.

1023
00:58:27,278 --> 00:58:30,948
Hey, I was Iooking at your wife,
she was doing that yoda.

1024
00:58:31,032 --> 00:58:33,742
And she got a nice Iittle butt.

1025
00:58:34,118 --> 00:58:36,286
But it ain't no booty, you know?

1026
00:58:36,412 --> 00:58:40,582
You Iike a butt, or you Iike a booty?

1027
00:58:41,751 --> 00:58:46,463
You Iike a booty, one that's a big, old booty
to grab Iike handlebars and use?

1028
00:58:46,547 --> 00:58:49,800
Steer that thing where you want it to go,
you know?

1029
00:58:49,926 --> 00:58:52,636
To be honest,

1030
00:58:52,720 --> 00:58:53,971
I Iove my wife.

1031
00:58:54,097 --> 00:58:56,473
She can't hear you. She can't hear.
Man-to-man, go on and tell me.

1032
00:58:56,557 --> 00:58:59,726
Do you Iike a Iittle cute, nice Iittle butt,
or do you Iike a big butt

1033
00:58:59,811 --> 00:59:02,437
that you can grab that thing
and slap it Iike handlebars?

1034
00:59:03,940 --> 00:59:08,318
Well, I would Iike
a Iittle more on the bottom.

1035
00:59:08,403 --> 00:59:09,820
Harley-Davidson.

1036
00:59:09,946 --> 00:59:10,988
- A Harley?
- Yeah.

1037
00:59:11,114 --> 00:59:12,489
Junk in the trunk.

1038
00:59:12,573 --> 00:59:16,076
Some junk in the trunk. Yeah, more junk.

1039
00:59:18,079 --> 00:59:19,579
As Iong as you're asking.

1040
00:59:22,667 --> 00:59:25,085
I got one Iast question for you, son.

1041
00:59:25,837 --> 00:59:30,007
When you go to the bathroom
and you're at the urinal,

1042
00:59:30,842 --> 00:59:33,010
do you stand there Iike this?

1043
00:59:34,512 --> 00:59:37,597
Or do you just happen
to stand there Iike this?

1044
00:59:39,475 --> 00:59:40,517
Well...

1045
00:59:40,601 --> 00:59:43,103
And when you're finished,
do you have to do this?

1046
00:59:46,441 --> 00:59:48,608
Which one is it for you, son? Which one?

1047
00:59:48,693 --> 00:59:51,695
Well, more Iike the second part.

1048
00:59:52,530 --> 00:59:54,865
Without the thing at the end.

1049
00:59:56,367 --> 00:59:57,534
Check.

1050
00:59:58,327 --> 01:00:01,288
Damn. I'm your daddy.

1051
01:00:03,791 --> 01:00:04,958
Excuse me?

1052
01:00:05,460 --> 01:00:07,377
Do you have any Wi-Fi?

1053
01:00:08,337 --> 01:00:11,048
Well, if you ask me nice,
I'll get up and I'll make you some.

1054
01:00:12,383 --> 01:00:15,218
Excuse me. How do you make Wi-Fi?

1055
01:00:16,512 --> 01:00:19,723
Son, you use some flour,
put a Iittle water in it, some powdered sugar,

1056
01:00:19,807 --> 01:00:21,475
you mix it up real good,
and you get your skillet,

1057
01:00:21,559 --> 01:00:22,976
or you get you one of them Wi-Fi irons,

1058
01:00:23,061 --> 01:00:26,229
and you pour it in the Wi-Fi iron
and you close it up.

1059
01:00:26,314 --> 01:00:28,565
I got a Wi-Fi iron in there.

1060
01:00:28,691 --> 01:00:30,317
What are you talking about?

1061
01:00:31,402 --> 01:00:34,738
He asked for a Wi-Fi, I got a waffle.
You want a Wi-Fi? I got a waffle.

1062
01:00:34,864 --> 01:00:37,032
Wi-Fi. Internet.

1063
01:00:38,910 --> 01:00:40,744
I don't have none of that.

1064
01:00:40,828 --> 01:00:43,830
Ain't no technology around here at all.
We've been Ieft in the Dark Ages.

1065
01:00:44,582 --> 01:00:46,333
It figures.

1066
01:00:46,417 --> 01:00:47,501
Howie.

1067
01:00:47,585 --> 01:00:49,086
Honey, why do you need
to get on the Internet?

1068
01:00:49,212 --> 01:00:50,670
I'm supposed to do a report.

1069
01:00:50,755 --> 01:00:53,090
I'll help you with your report. Okay, honey?

1070
01:00:53,174 --> 01:00:55,425
It doesn't really matter.
I mean, he's gonna fail.

1071
01:00:55,760 --> 01:00:58,178
- He's dumb Iike his mother.
- Enough.

1072
01:00:58,262 --> 01:00:59,846
Go to hell, Kate.

1073
01:01:03,017 --> 01:01:05,060
Did that child just say, "Go to hell"?

1074
01:01:11,859 --> 01:01:13,026
You all right?

1075
01:01:13,111 --> 01:01:15,028
Yeah. Thanks.

1076
01:01:15,113 --> 01:01:17,447
Come on, sit down and talk to me.

1077
01:01:18,699 --> 01:01:21,827
That child right there. Lord, that Iittle girl
about to make me hurt her.

1078
01:01:21,911 --> 01:01:24,871
I know. I'm trying to be understanding.

1079
01:01:24,956 --> 01:01:26,248
Of what?

1080
01:01:27,208 --> 01:01:28,917
She has problems.

1081
01:01:29,001 --> 01:01:30,085
Honey, we all got problems.

1082
01:01:30,169 --> 01:01:32,838
That child ain't supposed to be
talking to you all Iike that. That is crazy.

1083
01:01:32,922 --> 01:01:35,674
What's wrong with that child?
What's she so angry about?

1084
01:01:35,758 --> 01:01:38,426
I don't know.
Just being here and out of school.

1085
01:01:38,511 --> 01:01:40,220
Tell that to somebody else, honey.

1086
01:01:40,304 --> 01:01:44,558
That child is angry about something else,
and it's deep, whatever it is.

1087
01:01:44,642 --> 01:01:49,229
It ain't about no school and nothing else.
This water runs deeper than that.

1088
01:01:49,313 --> 01:01:50,605
How do you know?

1089
01:01:50,857 --> 01:01:53,483
Wisdom. I didn't get this old
by not knowing nothing.

1090
01:01:55,695 --> 01:01:59,281
She thinks I'm the reason
that her father divorced her mother.

1091
01:02:00,575 --> 01:02:02,909
I wonder where she'd get that from.

1092
01:02:02,994 --> 01:02:04,161
Are you?

1093
01:02:04,245 --> 01:02:06,913
No. What kind of person do you think I am?

1094
01:02:07,665 --> 01:02:09,166
A woman.

1095
01:02:10,084 --> 01:02:12,544
No, their marriage was over,

1096
01:02:12,628 --> 01:02:17,257
her father filed for divorce already,
but she's hated me ever since she met me.

1097
01:02:17,842 --> 01:02:19,759
And George just sit there,
don't say nothing?

1098
01:02:19,844 --> 01:02:21,386
He just sit there and not say a word?

1099
01:02:21,846 --> 01:02:24,306
George doesn't say anything
to anyone these days.

1100
01:02:24,932 --> 01:02:26,266
Lord, have mercy.

1101
01:02:26,350 --> 01:02:28,101
I know. But she needs him.

1102
01:02:28,186 --> 01:02:30,395
Because her mother, she is so evil.

1103
01:02:30,479 --> 01:02:33,899
She filled her head with all these
horrible things about me and about us.

1104
01:02:33,983 --> 01:02:35,358
And then, two years ago,

1105
01:02:35,443 --> 01:02:38,904
she dropped her off at our doorstep,
hasn't contacted her ever since,

1106
01:02:38,988 --> 01:02:40,488
and now she's angry.

1107
01:02:40,698 --> 01:02:42,949
And now she's up in my house
and she got me worried.

1108
01:02:43,034 --> 01:02:44,034
Honey, I'm just worried.

1109
01:02:44,493 --> 01:02:45,744
She'll be fine.

1110
01:02:45,828 --> 01:02:47,704
I'm not worried about her,
I'm worried about me.

1111
01:02:47,788 --> 01:02:49,581
'Cause I feel Iike I wanna choke her to sleep.

1112
01:02:49,665 --> 01:02:51,875
I just wanna grab her
till the Iife is out of her sometimes.

1113
01:02:51,959 --> 01:02:53,084
She's so flip.

1114
01:02:53,169 --> 01:02:54,502
Yeah, I get it.

1115
01:02:54,587 --> 01:02:57,464
And when she talk back to you,
you just have a Iittle argument with her

1116
01:02:57,548 --> 01:03:00,217
and you just Iet her start her mouth
and say whatever she want to say?

1117
01:03:00,301 --> 01:03:01,384
Don't do that, honey.

1118
01:03:01,469 --> 01:03:04,930
You have to talk to her in a Ianguage
that she understand.

1119
01:03:05,014 --> 01:03:07,724
You got to Iearn
how to start speaking your damn mind.

1120
01:03:07,808 --> 01:03:08,892
I speak my mind.

1121
01:03:08,976 --> 01:03:12,145
I didn't say, "Speak your mind,"
I said, "Speak your damn mind."

1122
01:03:12,230 --> 01:03:14,356
If somebody do something
you don't Iike, you say,

1123
01:03:14,440 --> 01:03:16,066
"Hey, what the hell is wrong with you?

1124
01:03:16,150 --> 01:03:18,443
"You better get your ass together.
This is some straight up bull.

1125
01:03:18,527 --> 01:03:21,529
"Hell, what is wrong with you?
You heard me? Hell."

1126
01:03:22,198 --> 01:03:24,366
That's what you got
to say to them sometime.

1127
01:03:25,034 --> 01:03:26,701
- Okay. I will.
- Think about that.

1128
01:03:26,786 --> 01:03:28,536
It'll make you feel better.
You'll feel so Iiberated.

1129
01:03:28,621 --> 01:03:31,581
You're around here doing all that yoda.
Honey, you ain't got to do all that yoda.

1130
01:03:31,666 --> 01:03:33,208
You ain't got to do not one more yoda.

1131
01:03:33,751 --> 01:03:35,085
I'm gonna try that next time.

1132
01:03:35,169 --> 01:03:36,711
Good. I just gave you some great advice.

1133
01:03:36,796 --> 01:03:38,129
You gave me some good advice.

1134
01:03:38,214 --> 01:03:39,422
I'm gonna give you some better advice.

1135
01:03:39,507 --> 01:03:40,548
White folks ain't supposed to be out here

1136
01:03:40,633 --> 01:03:42,217
on this porch
in the middle of the night, honey.

1137
01:03:42,301 --> 01:03:43,301
Okay.

1138
01:03:43,386 --> 01:03:45,428
Yep. Nope, come on,
Iet's go on in the house.

1139
01:03:45,513 --> 01:03:47,305
- Thank you.
- Yeah, you go on first.

1140
01:03:49,725 --> 01:03:51,476
Any luck?

1141
01:03:52,270 --> 01:03:53,770
No, none.

1142
01:03:55,189 --> 01:03:56,231
George.

1143
01:03:56,315 --> 01:04:00,527
Yeah, I know what you're going to say.
You don't think I'm trying.

1144
01:04:01,362 --> 01:04:03,488
Look at this charity, right here.

1145
01:04:04,073 --> 01:04:06,950
Okay. I don't really have to Iook at it.

1146
01:04:07,034 --> 01:04:09,744
Hear me out.
Listen to what I'm saying to you.

1147
01:04:09,829 --> 01:04:11,871
These guys dig wells in Africa.

1148
01:04:12,456 --> 01:04:14,499
This one, breast cancer.

1149
01:04:14,583 --> 01:04:19,045
This one,
they stop sex trafficking of children. Okay?

1150
01:04:19,130 --> 01:04:21,548
This one, AIDS research. This one, cancer.

1151
01:04:21,632 --> 01:04:23,675
This homeless shelter
is gonna have to close.

1152
01:04:23,759 --> 01:04:26,720
George, you got to help me
help these people.

1153
01:04:34,270 --> 01:04:38,815
Brian, I'm eight years away from retiring,

1154
01:04:40,026 --> 01:04:42,235
and now I'm facing jail.

1155
01:04:42,737 --> 01:04:45,030
And all these people were hurt

1156
01:04:45,906 --> 01:04:48,450
because I wasn't paying attention.

1157
01:04:50,870 --> 01:04:53,121
And I was Iooking forward to retiring.

1158
01:04:55,124 --> 01:04:57,167
Spending time with my son.

1159
01:04:58,586 --> 01:05:02,630
Getting great, big bear hugs
after a good game of catch, you know?

1160
01:05:03,883 --> 01:05:05,425
Seeing my daughter happy,

1161
01:05:06,844 --> 01:05:08,094
content.

1162
01:05:10,139 --> 01:05:13,725
I just wanted to Iive happily ever after
with my family.

1163
01:05:14,935 --> 01:05:19,189
And now, my family's falling apart.

1164
01:05:19,732 --> 01:05:23,651
So maybe I deserve all of this, okay?

1165
01:05:23,736 --> 01:05:27,072
'Cause I can't believe
what's happening to me.

1166
01:05:27,156 --> 01:05:29,866
How could I not see this coming?

1167
01:05:29,950 --> 01:05:34,621
George, you couldn't see it
because you weren't paying attention.

1168
01:05:34,705 --> 01:05:36,581
But now your eyes are wide open.

1169
01:05:38,793 --> 01:05:41,378
But none of this makes sense to me.

1170
01:05:41,462 --> 01:05:45,382
I mean, I see accounts here and they all start
with a Ietter of the alphabet.

1171
01:05:45,466 --> 01:05:50,512
"A," "P," "U," "J," "K," "R," "I."

1172
01:05:50,971 --> 01:05:54,224
We never use the alphabet
to start accounts, Brian.

1173
01:05:54,308 --> 01:05:57,727
I don't know what I'm Iooking at here.
I really don't.

1174
01:05:59,980 --> 01:06:03,733
You can't just keep Ietting people
walk all over you.

1175
01:06:04,568 --> 01:06:08,363
You were a mark. They set you up.
They thought you were weak.

1176
01:06:09,573 --> 01:06:11,825
They did this on purpose to you.

1177
01:06:11,909 --> 01:06:13,451
Are you just gonna Iay down
and Iet that happen,

1178
01:06:13,536 --> 01:06:15,036
or are you gonna claim your Iife back?

1179
01:06:15,121 --> 01:06:17,997
Prove them wrong.
Hit them right between the eyes.

1180
01:06:18,999 --> 01:06:23,336
You're stronger than this.
There is a fighter in you, George.

1181
01:06:24,463 --> 01:06:27,090
Show them. Show me.

1182
01:06:27,174 --> 01:06:31,094
You can work this out, okay?
Just don't give up.

1183
01:06:33,722 --> 01:06:35,390
Shall we keep digging?

1184
01:06:35,474 --> 01:06:37,183
- Okay.
- Okay.

1185
01:06:37,268 --> 01:06:38,977
- Okay.
- AII right.

1186
01:06:39,437 --> 01:06:40,728
Watch your step.

1187
01:06:43,983 --> 01:06:45,442
Take care now.

1188
01:06:51,031 --> 01:06:52,157
How was school?

1189
01:06:52,241 --> 01:06:54,075
I mean, you know, it's school.

1190
01:06:54,201 --> 01:06:55,577
School is school, yeah.

1191
01:06:55,661 --> 01:06:57,120
What you got there?

1192
01:06:57,204 --> 01:06:59,080
- Baseball.
- Baseball.

1193
01:06:59,165 --> 01:07:00,206
You play?

1194
01:07:00,499 --> 01:07:03,126
Yeah, but not very good.

1195
01:07:03,210 --> 01:07:04,586
Really?

1196
01:07:04,962 --> 01:07:06,713
Well, Iet me see, son. You can't be that bad.

1197
01:07:06,797 --> 01:07:08,298
- What position do you play?
- Pitcher.

1198
01:07:08,382 --> 01:07:09,716
Okay. Well, I used to play catcher.

1199
01:07:09,800 --> 01:07:11,676
So, you go on over there
and I want you to throw it to me.

1200
01:07:11,760 --> 01:07:12,886
- AII right.
- I want you to throw it to me

1201
01:07:12,970 --> 01:07:14,053
as hard as you can.

1202
01:07:14,847 --> 01:07:16,764
- Throw it at me.
- AII right.

1203
01:07:16,849 --> 01:07:18,391
Here we go. Put it. Put it right here.

1204
01:07:18,476 --> 01:07:21,019
- Put it right in the middle.
- Right here, right here.

1205
01:07:25,065 --> 01:07:26,691
Yeah, you... Yeah.

1206
01:07:26,775 --> 01:07:28,818
- Yeah, you suck.
- Sorry, I...

1207
01:07:29,820 --> 01:07:31,738
Come here, son.

1208
01:07:33,157 --> 01:07:34,449
That's all right, son.

1209
01:07:34,533 --> 01:07:37,785
Maybe you ain't supposed to be a pitcher.
Everybody ain't supposed to be a pitcher.

1210
01:07:37,870 --> 01:07:39,913
You know, you got to get in where you fit in.

1211
01:07:39,997 --> 01:07:41,623
You know, I never thought about it that way.

1212
01:07:41,707 --> 01:07:42,999
But Iisten, son. I'm gonna help you.

1213
01:07:43,083 --> 01:07:46,085
I'm gonna teach you how to pitch
and to catch,

1214
01:07:46,170 --> 01:07:48,171
because we family, we family.

1215
01:07:48,547 --> 01:07:50,131
- We are?
- Yeah.

1216
01:07:50,216 --> 01:07:53,760
Yeah. It's a Iong story. It's a Iong story.

1217
01:07:53,844 --> 01:07:55,386
I used to be in the Negro League.

1218
01:07:56,639 --> 01:07:58,681
- Negro...
- The Negro League, son.

1219
01:07:58,766 --> 01:08:02,143
Boy, somebody got to teach you
about your heritage.

1220
01:08:02,228 --> 01:08:08,858
The Negro Leagues is when
colored baseball players couldn't play...

1221
01:08:09,693 --> 01:08:11,694
Colored, Iike Negro, Iike me and you.

1222
01:08:11,779 --> 01:08:16,324
They couldn't play professional baseball,
so they came up with their own Ieague.

1223
01:08:16,408 --> 01:08:17,951
Satchel Paige and I played.

1224
01:08:18,035 --> 01:08:21,871
I was a catcher,
so I'm gonna show you how to be a catcher.

1225
01:08:21,956 --> 01:08:23,289
- AII right. AII right.
- AII right?

1226
01:08:23,374 --> 01:08:25,416
Step on back there.
I'm gonna show you how to catch this.

1227
01:08:25,543 --> 01:08:27,126
- I'm gonna throw it to you one good time.
- AII right.

1228
01:08:27,211 --> 01:08:29,712
- I want you to concentrate real hard.
- AII right.

1229
01:08:31,715 --> 01:08:34,384
Almost. AII right, try it.
Right here, right here.

1230
01:08:34,635 --> 01:08:35,927
There we go. See that?

1231
01:08:36,262 --> 01:08:38,137
- I've had it.
- I don't care.

1232
01:08:38,222 --> 01:08:39,222
Change your attitude.

1233
01:08:39,306 --> 01:08:40,723
- Hello, son.
- Hi, Mom.

1234
01:08:40,808 --> 01:08:42,725
- Your poor father...
- My father does not need...

1235
01:08:42,810 --> 01:08:46,062
Were you with your brother today?
AII day today, again?

1236
01:08:46,897 --> 01:08:50,108
No, Mom, I was with Brian.

1237
01:08:50,234 --> 01:08:52,402
I don't have a brother, remember?

1238
01:08:52,945 --> 01:08:54,487
This is all an act!

1239
01:08:54,572 --> 01:08:55,572
Right.

1240
01:08:55,656 --> 01:08:56,698
I am not being disrespectful!

1241
01:08:56,782 --> 01:08:59,325
You're being so fake!
You're not my mom!

1242
01:08:59,410 --> 01:09:00,743
- ...your attitude.
- You're making it no better.

1243
01:09:00,828 --> 01:09:01,828
Get upstairs!

1244
01:09:01,912 --> 01:09:04,622
I want to go home. I hate it here.

1245
01:09:05,082 --> 01:09:06,332
- Hi.
- Hi.

1246
01:09:06,792 --> 01:09:08,918
George, I can't do this anymore.

1247
01:09:09,003 --> 01:09:10,920
- That daughter is so disrespectful.
- I know.

1248
01:09:11,005 --> 01:09:14,841
I'm gonna do all I can
to help us get our Iife back.

1249
01:09:14,925 --> 01:09:17,093
I don't want our Iife back.

1250
01:09:18,012 --> 01:09:19,429
I want a new Iife.

1251
01:09:19,513 --> 01:09:22,599
One where you're in it.
One where we're all happy.

1252
01:09:22,683 --> 01:09:26,477
I don't know, afternoon Iunches and sex!

1253
01:09:26,604 --> 01:09:28,313
I want sex, George!

1254
01:09:28,939 --> 01:09:30,481
Should I be Iistening to this?

1255
01:09:30,608 --> 01:09:31,816
- No!
- No!

1256
01:09:33,360 --> 01:09:36,154
Kate, I'm sorry.

1257
01:09:36,655 --> 01:09:39,824
Stop saying sorry and get mad.

1258
01:09:39,950 --> 01:09:41,993
- I am mad.
- You're not mad.

1259
01:09:42,119 --> 01:09:44,245
I'm extremely mad.

1260
01:09:44,330 --> 01:09:45,955
Extremely mad, George?

1261
01:09:48,125 --> 01:09:49,417
You don't think I'm mad?

1262
01:09:49,501 --> 01:09:50,960
I don't think you're mad.

1263
01:09:53,464 --> 01:09:57,050
This is getting me so mad, this whole thing.

1264
01:09:57,134 --> 01:09:58,259
That's mad.

1265
01:09:58,344 --> 01:10:00,970
You're not extremely mad!
You need to get damn mad!

1266
01:10:01,513 --> 01:10:02,639
What?

1267
01:10:03,724 --> 01:10:05,975
I'm just speaking my damn mind, okay?

1268
01:10:06,060 --> 01:10:08,978
Hell! This is some straight up bull.

1269
01:10:09,396 --> 01:10:13,441
Hell, get your ass together. You heard me?

1270
01:10:13,525 --> 01:10:14,817
Hell!

1271
01:10:20,574 --> 01:10:22,367
I've got to get us out of here.

1272
01:10:25,329 --> 01:10:26,996
Just spill it. We gotta have it all.

1273
01:10:27,498 --> 01:10:30,249
Because if you don't, then you're
going to jail for the rest of your Iife.

1274
01:10:33,337 --> 01:10:35,213
Ever since we got here,
I don't care anymore.

1275
01:10:35,756 --> 01:10:37,423
Do you know what? I don't care.
You...

1276
01:10:52,731 --> 01:10:55,024
- Hi, honey.
- Hi. What are you doing?

1277
01:11:08,372 --> 01:11:11,457
- Good one. Good one, Howie.
- Thanks.

1278
01:11:12,876 --> 01:11:13,876
You got it.

1279
01:11:31,603 --> 01:11:36,107
Amazing Grace...

1280
01:11:37,860 --> 01:11:39,736
How was school today?

1281
01:11:39,862 --> 01:11:42,697
About the same
as when you were raised by Moses.

1282
01:11:43,115 --> 01:11:44,365
Where's my dad?

1283
01:11:44,450 --> 01:11:46,284
I can't stand you.

1284
01:11:48,454 --> 01:11:51,914
I got something to tell you, honey.
It's awfully bad news.

1285
01:11:52,374 --> 01:11:53,958
Precious Lord...

1286
01:11:54,084 --> 01:11:55,293
What?

1287
01:11:58,380 --> 01:11:59,964
Your daddy died.

1288
01:12:01,925 --> 01:12:03,050
What?

1289
01:12:03,135 --> 01:12:04,260
He died.

1290
01:12:05,596 --> 01:12:09,599
Them people that were Iooking for him,
they came here and they got him.

1291
01:12:10,976 --> 01:12:12,769
And they brought him out there
to the highway,

1292
01:12:12,895 --> 01:12:17,523
and they was painting them stripes
on the stone highway, and he tried to run,

1293
01:12:17,608 --> 01:12:20,902
and one of them stripe machine
put a Iine right down the middle of him.

1294
01:12:20,986 --> 01:12:24,280
Then the people that was coming
didn't know if it was a passing Iane

1295
01:12:24,406 --> 01:12:26,949
or high-occupancy vehicle Iane.

1296
01:12:27,075 --> 01:12:28,659
Everybody got confused
and they had a wreck,

1297
01:12:28,786 --> 01:12:29,952
and they just ran all over...

1298
01:12:30,078 --> 01:12:33,122
About 5,700 cars piled up on top of him.

1299
01:12:33,791 --> 01:12:37,543
And Kate, she didn't know what to do,
so she went to running.

1300
01:12:37,628 --> 01:12:41,297
She just started running as fast as she can.
Was running Iike Wonder Woman.

1301
01:12:41,423 --> 01:12:44,926
But they had a helichopter
and that helichopter got closer...

1302
01:12:45,010 --> 01:12:46,260
And that was it.

1303
01:12:46,470 --> 01:12:48,095
No! Kate, too?

1304
01:12:48,639 --> 01:12:50,431
Kate, too. Kate, too.

1305
01:12:50,516 --> 01:12:52,558
And that helichopter was spinning
and them blades...

1306
01:12:52,643 --> 01:12:55,603
Where's Howie? Where's Howie?

1307
01:12:56,980 --> 01:12:59,232
Oh, Lord. Poor Howie.
You know, he tried to run,

1308
01:12:59,316 --> 01:13:02,485
but he always have them candy bars
and soda pops in his pockets,

1309
01:13:02,611 --> 01:13:05,530
so he kept dropping things and he tripped.

1310
01:13:05,656 --> 01:13:07,865
So they put them cement shoes on him
and they throwed him in,

1311
01:13:07,991 --> 01:13:09,158
and he's swimming with the fishes.

1312
01:13:09,284 --> 01:13:10,326
Oh, my God!

1313
01:13:11,203 --> 01:13:13,955
My God! I can't believe this is happening.

1314
01:13:14,039 --> 01:13:15,998
Why you so upset?

1315
01:13:16,124 --> 01:13:17,458
What do you mean?

1316
01:13:17,543 --> 01:13:21,128
Well, you always say, "I hate you. You suck.
Shut up. I hate you."

1317
01:13:21,213 --> 01:13:24,549
I didn't mean anything that I've said before.

1318
01:13:24,675 --> 01:13:25,925
It's too Iate now, honey.

1319
01:13:26,009 --> 01:13:29,345
It's all right. They gone. Dead. Just done.

1320
01:13:30,055 --> 01:13:31,305
They gone.

1321
01:13:31,390 --> 01:13:35,059
So, the people at Child Welfare asked me
if I would take you,

1322
01:13:35,185 --> 01:13:36,936
so I said you can stay here till you're 18,
but you...

1323
01:13:37,020 --> 01:13:39,230
No! No, no! No!

1324
01:13:39,356 --> 01:13:41,691
I got an EBT card, what you worried about?

1325
01:13:41,817 --> 01:13:42,859
- Dad!
- Honey.

1326
01:13:43,485 --> 01:13:45,528
Cindy, what's wrong?

1327
01:13:45,654 --> 01:13:47,530
She told me you died.

1328
01:13:47,739 --> 01:13:48,739
What?

1329
01:13:49,366 --> 01:13:51,909
Madea, why would you tell her that?

1330
01:13:52,035 --> 01:13:53,327
Look, this is why I tell her that.

1331
01:13:53,412 --> 01:13:56,205
'Cause she's sitting around here mad
at everybody and being all nasty and mean.

1332
01:13:56,331 --> 01:13:59,709
Your parents could be gone at any minute,
then you'll be stuck with somebody Iike me.

1333
01:13:59,835 --> 01:14:02,128
Is that what you want?
To stay here in this hellhole?

1334
01:14:02,212 --> 01:14:03,254
I'm sorry.

1335
01:14:03,380 --> 01:14:05,673
Start acting Iike you're sorry, then.

1336
01:14:05,757 --> 01:14:07,675
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Howie.

1337
01:14:07,759 --> 01:14:09,260
It's all right. It's all right, Cindy.

1338
01:14:09,386 --> 01:14:12,388
Now, Iook at her, all broke up,
acting Iike she's sad and hurt.

1339
01:14:14,433 --> 01:14:16,350
Okay, honey. It's okay.

1340
01:14:16,435 --> 01:14:19,270
Madea, that was really cruel.

1341
01:14:19,396 --> 01:14:22,523
George? Shut the hell up.

1342
01:14:23,066 --> 01:14:24,901
It worked, didn't it?

1343
01:14:27,571 --> 01:14:29,488
- Dad?
- Yeah, son.

1344
01:14:29,573 --> 01:14:30,656
There's something I need to tell you.

1345
01:14:30,741 --> 01:14:34,285
It'll have to wait till Iater.
I got to start the service right now.

1346
01:14:39,666 --> 01:14:40,875
Negros.

1347
01:14:45,422 --> 01:14:47,006
What the hell did you just say?

1348
01:14:47,299 --> 01:14:49,383
- Negros.
- Barbara!

1349
01:14:49,468 --> 01:14:50,676
Mom,

1350
01:14:51,053 --> 01:14:56,098
why don't we step out onto the porch
and get some air?

1351
01:14:56,183 --> 01:14:58,142
- Negros.
- Grams.

1352
01:14:58,226 --> 01:15:01,145
I hear Negros from my room.

1353
01:15:01,229 --> 01:15:04,607
I believe they're called
African-Americans now, Grandma.

1354
01:15:04,691 --> 01:15:06,692
Did that child just say "they"?

1355
01:15:06,777 --> 01:15:08,486
No, "we."

1356
01:15:08,570 --> 01:15:12,198
So beautiful. I hear them from my room.

1357
01:15:12,282 --> 01:15:13,491
- Okay.
- What's going on?

1358
01:15:13,575 --> 01:15:17,119
My baby mama just went Ieft, Mabel.
She just went Ieft.

1359
01:15:17,204 --> 01:15:18,329
Went Ieft?

1360
01:15:18,413 --> 01:15:19,872
I hear...

1361
01:15:20,749 --> 01:15:24,877
I hear them from my room.
I hear Negros from my room.

1362
01:15:24,962 --> 01:15:28,297
Well, I see dead people,
but I keep that to myself.

1363
01:15:28,632 --> 01:15:30,007
Tell them, Sadie.

1364
01:15:30,092 --> 01:15:31,467
Who the hell is Sadie?

1365
01:15:32,135 --> 01:15:33,386
Shut up.

1366
01:15:33,887 --> 01:15:36,764
Madea, honey. She right, she hear Negros.

1367
01:15:39,434 --> 01:15:42,144
It's bad enough that she's slipping.

1368
01:15:42,229 --> 01:15:43,813
Please don't encourage her.

1369
01:15:43,897 --> 01:15:46,649
No, she do hear Negros.

1370
01:15:46,733 --> 01:15:48,192
The whole bunch of them.

1371
01:15:48,777 --> 01:15:51,821
She hears a bunch of Negros?

1372
01:15:53,573 --> 01:15:55,616
Yes, everybody Iisten. Everybody be quiet.

1373
01:15:58,036 --> 01:15:59,453
Spirituals.

1374
01:15:59,538 --> 01:16:02,248
That's it. That's what she's trying to say,
Negro spirituals.

1375
01:16:02,332 --> 01:16:04,542
There's a church down on the corner.

1376
01:16:04,626 --> 01:16:07,044
They sing Negro spirituals on Sundays.

1377
01:16:07,129 --> 01:16:09,046
Why y'all so uptight?

1378
01:16:10,465 --> 01:16:14,010
Son, will you take me to the Negros?

1379
01:16:14,094 --> 01:16:16,429
- Take you to the Negro spiritual, honey.
- Spiritual.

1380
01:16:16,513 --> 01:16:18,973
Right. You can't just say "Negros."
Them days has passed.

1381
01:16:19,057 --> 01:16:20,975
First we were "Negros,"
then we was "colored,"

1382
01:16:21,059 --> 01:16:23,561
then we were "black,"
now we "African-American."

1383
01:16:23,645 --> 01:16:26,772
Okay? African-Americans.
Now singing old Negro spirituals.

1384
01:16:26,857 --> 01:16:28,024
- Spirituals.
- Negro spirituals.

1385
01:16:28,108 --> 01:16:31,444
- Spirituals. Spirituals. Okay.
- Yes, Mom. Yes, yes.

1386
01:16:31,528 --> 01:16:32,862
Yes, Iet's go.

1387
01:16:33,280 --> 01:16:36,657
Let's go down to the church.

1388
01:16:36,742 --> 01:16:37,783
Is it safe?

1389
01:16:38,160 --> 01:16:39,368
What you mean, "Is it safe," George?

1390
01:16:39,453 --> 01:16:42,121
What they gonna do,
stone you with a Bible? It's a church.

1391
01:17:27,918 --> 01:17:29,293
Pretty good.

1392
01:17:40,972 --> 01:17:42,890
Can I get an "amen" for our choir?

1393
01:17:42,974 --> 01:17:44,308
Amen!

1394
01:17:44,434 --> 01:17:45,851
AII right, well done.

1395
01:17:46,436 --> 01:17:47,812
Well done.

1396
01:17:49,106 --> 01:17:50,106
Praise the Lord.

1397
01:17:50,190 --> 01:17:52,024
Praise the Lord!

1398
01:17:54,319 --> 01:17:59,031
Praise the Lord. I am so happy, so happy
to be back in the House of the Lord

1399
01:18:00,534 --> 01:18:02,785
where mercy can be found.

1400
01:18:03,787 --> 01:18:08,249
As most of you know, I have
been very sick these past few months.

1401
01:18:08,333 --> 01:18:11,836
But by the grace of God, I've recovered.
But I have to tell you something.

1402
01:18:13,213 --> 01:18:17,633
I've given a Iot of prayer
and I feel it's time for me to retire.

1403
01:18:19,302 --> 01:18:21,220
Now don't y'all worry, don't worry.

1404
01:18:21,304 --> 01:18:24,557
This church will continue,
and its future's guaranteed,

1405
01:18:24,641 --> 01:18:27,476
because the church has been paid off.

1406
01:18:29,729 --> 01:18:34,692
Praise God!

1407
01:18:34,818 --> 01:18:36,068
Oh, no.

1408
01:18:40,073 --> 01:18:44,910
And I was able to pay the church off
because of the investments of my son.

1409
01:18:45,829 --> 01:18:47,037
My son.

1410
01:18:47,998 --> 01:18:49,415
I'm so proud of him.

1411
01:18:49,499 --> 01:18:52,376
Son, come on up here
and tell them what you've done.

1412
01:18:52,502 --> 01:18:56,005
Let us praise Jesus
'cause we're all precious in His name.

1413
01:18:56,089 --> 01:18:57,506
Precious.

1414
01:18:59,843 --> 01:19:01,177
Precious?

1415
01:19:02,179 --> 01:19:03,512
- To all the congregation here...
- Precious.

1416
01:19:05,015 --> 01:19:06,932
...there's something I need to tell you.

1417
01:19:07,350 --> 01:19:08,767
I did invest the money...

1418
01:19:08,852 --> 01:19:12,897
Precious!

1419
01:19:13,023 --> 01:19:14,440
Somebody's got the Holy Ghost.

1420
01:19:15,525 --> 01:19:19,612
I know!

1421
01:19:20,572 --> 01:19:23,032
- You know?
- I know!

1422
01:19:23,116 --> 01:19:25,075
The same know that I know?

1423
01:19:25,202 --> 01:19:26,660
I know!

1424
01:19:26,745 --> 01:19:27,828
That man knows!

1425
01:19:27,913 --> 01:19:29,747
- You know?
- I know!

1426
01:19:29,873 --> 01:19:33,083
- How much do you know?
- Do you think that he knows now?

1427
01:19:33,210 --> 01:19:35,044
- I'm not hot, I just know.
- Praise the Lord!

1428
01:19:35,128 --> 01:19:36,378
Yes!

1429
01:19:36,463 --> 01:19:38,255
AII right, George, you want to try
to explain this to me?

1430
01:19:38,381 --> 01:19:39,465
Yeah.

1431
01:19:39,549 --> 01:19:41,634
There was a woman
named Precious Jackson

1432
01:19:41,718 --> 01:19:43,636
that Walter always told me about. Okay?

1433
01:19:43,720 --> 01:19:46,597
Now I've Iooked at these accounts
and they all start with a Ietter.

1434
01:19:46,723 --> 01:19:49,391
The Ietters spell out "Precious Jackson."

1435
01:19:50,060 --> 01:19:52,311
It's all encrypted, right here.

1436
01:19:52,395 --> 01:19:54,730
What the hell are you talking about?

1437
01:19:55,273 --> 01:19:56,899
The Ietters spell out...

1438
01:19:56,983 --> 01:19:58,525
Okay, I'm a Iittle confused
by this, too.

1439
01:19:58,610 --> 01:20:00,903
It's the name the account is in.

1440
01:20:01,446 --> 01:20:02,529
Okay.

1441
01:20:02,614 --> 01:20:05,824
Just follow this, 'cause it took some doing

1442
01:20:05,909 --> 01:20:08,744
to follow the money trail
from the Cayman Islands and Germany.

1443
01:20:08,828 --> 01:20:14,291
But the trail goes cold when the money
goes into a Swiss account. Okay?

1444
01:20:14,417 --> 01:20:18,254
Now, they were all given a Ietter
when they went in and came out.

1445
01:20:18,922 --> 01:20:20,130
- Right?
- Okay.

1446
01:20:20,257 --> 01:20:24,009
But every month on this date,

1447
01:20:24,094 --> 01:20:27,471
as the funds go into this Swiss account,

1448
01:20:27,597 --> 01:20:30,557
this account in the US sees a deposit.

1449
01:20:30,642 --> 01:20:34,395
Now I balance the two, and it's exactly 10 %

1450
01:20:34,479 --> 01:20:38,399
that resurfaces in the US
in this account every month

1451
01:20:38,483 --> 01:20:41,151
to a Iady named Precious Jackson.

1452
01:20:41,611 --> 01:20:43,529
What is 10 % gonna do?

1453
01:20:43,613 --> 01:20:46,156
Of 600 million?

1454
01:20:46,241 --> 01:20:48,867
That's six million!

1455
01:20:48,952 --> 01:20:50,077
Jake.

1456
01:20:52,914 --> 01:20:54,957
It's 60 million.

1457
01:20:55,041 --> 01:20:56,792
- Sixty.
- Sixty.

1458
01:20:56,876 --> 01:20:58,877
George.

1459
01:20:58,962 --> 01:21:00,546
I can get the church's money back.

1460
01:21:00,964 --> 01:21:03,757
- Praise God.
- Yes, you and all the charities.

1461
01:21:03,842 --> 01:21:05,926
- Can this really work?
- Yes, it can work.

1462
01:21:06,011 --> 01:21:07,386
Why would Walter take this money

1463
01:21:07,470 --> 01:21:10,306
and put it in an account with
some woman's name who never touches it?

1464
01:21:10,682 --> 01:21:14,685
Well, either he didn't tell her about it,
or she doesn't exist.

1465
01:21:14,769 --> 01:21:18,188
So what I'll do is I'll get a federal warrant,

1466
01:21:18,273 --> 01:21:19,815
we'll get the account seized.

1467
01:21:19,899 --> 01:21:22,860
I'm pretty sure once I bring this to the judge,
you'll be able to get probation.

1468
01:21:22,944 --> 01:21:23,986
That's a great job.

1469
01:21:24,070 --> 01:21:27,281
But, Brian, we can get this money
back to the people it belongs to.

1470
01:21:27,365 --> 01:21:29,366
It's sitting right here in this account.

1471
01:21:29,451 --> 01:21:31,660
You didn't just say that to me.
I'm an officer of the court.

1472
01:21:31,745 --> 01:21:33,746
I don't even know what you're thinking.
I didn't hear that.

1473
01:21:33,830 --> 01:21:36,248
I don't even want to know
what you're thinking. No. No, no, no.

1474
01:21:36,333 --> 01:21:37,833
- Brian.
- Not having this conversation.

1475
01:21:37,917 --> 01:21:39,335
- I'm out of here.
- Please. Come on.

1476
01:21:39,419 --> 01:21:41,045
- I will see you at the office tomorrow...
- Brian.

1477
01:21:41,129 --> 01:21:42,129
...bright and early, George.

1478
01:21:42,213 --> 01:21:43,505
- Thank you so much.
- Brian. Please.

1479
01:21:43,590 --> 01:21:44,631
Bye.

1480
01:21:46,509 --> 01:21:49,178
I've come too close to give up now, okay?
I'm not calling it quits.

1481
01:21:49,262 --> 01:21:51,930
I'm gonna get that money
back to the charities.

1482
01:21:53,016 --> 01:21:55,059
Right? I want my Iife back.

1483
01:21:55,852 --> 01:21:58,479
And here is where I start to take action.

1484
01:21:58,563 --> 01:22:02,733
So you're either with me or you're not,
but I'm not giving up without a fight.

1485
01:22:02,859 --> 01:22:06,820
So what's it gonna be,
Mr. I'm-a-tough-guy-from-the-hood?

1486
01:22:06,905 --> 01:22:09,823
Mr. You-going-down-homie?

1487
01:22:09,908 --> 01:22:13,160
'Cause I'll tell you,
I'm gonna do the damn thing.

1488
01:22:13,244 --> 01:22:15,037
So you're with me or what?

1489
01:22:16,039 --> 01:22:17,164
I'm with you.

1490
01:22:17,248 --> 01:22:19,375
- Gucci!
- Yeah.

1491
01:22:21,294 --> 01:22:22,378
With you.

1492
01:22:28,218 --> 01:22:29,468
You okay?

1493
01:22:30,553 --> 01:22:31,637
I will be.

1494
01:22:32,097 --> 01:22:34,598
George, what's going on?

1495
01:22:34,724 --> 01:22:37,309
I screwed up, that's what's going on.

1496
01:22:37,394 --> 01:22:39,937
And now there's a big wrong
that I have to right.

1497
01:22:40,063 --> 01:22:44,316
And I just have to figure out
how I'm gonna do it.

1498
01:22:44,401 --> 01:22:46,735
But I'm gonna do it. I am gonna do it.

1499
01:22:47,737 --> 01:22:50,989
George, I haven't seen this much fire in you
since we got married.

1500
01:22:51,241 --> 01:22:53,742
Well, maybe it's Iong overdue, huh?

1501
01:22:55,161 --> 01:22:58,247
Do you remember
our honeymoon in Florence?

1502
01:22:59,457 --> 01:23:02,251
- I remember it rained every day.
- It did.

1503
01:23:02,669 --> 01:23:04,086
And do you remember, you said,

1504
01:23:04,170 --> 01:23:07,256
"What if our marriage is
nothing but full of rainy days?"

1505
01:23:07,340 --> 01:23:09,425
I might have been joking.

1506
01:23:09,968 --> 01:23:12,344
But I remember
you still got upset, didn't you?

1507
01:23:12,429 --> 01:23:14,012
- I did.
- Yeah.

1508
01:23:14,097 --> 01:23:15,305
And what did you say?

1509
01:23:16,015 --> 01:23:17,933
I said,

1510
01:23:18,017 --> 01:23:21,311
"Rain does make things grow."

1511
01:23:21,438 --> 01:23:23,188
Exactly.

1512
01:23:23,273 --> 01:23:26,400
What if all this happened for a reason?

1513
01:23:26,484 --> 01:23:28,444
For you and I
to get to know each other again,

1514
01:23:28,528 --> 01:23:31,864
for our family to get closer, for us to grow?

1515
01:23:33,283 --> 01:23:34,867
What if it did?

1516
01:23:35,952 --> 01:23:38,704
Kate, you are amazing.

1517
01:23:39,956 --> 01:23:42,207
I swear to you, I'm gonna make things right.

1518
01:23:42,292 --> 01:23:44,918
I have no doubt.

1519
01:23:45,003 --> 01:23:47,087
Honey, you always do the right thing.

1520
01:23:47,172 --> 01:23:48,797
I Iove you so much.

1521
01:23:48,882 --> 01:23:50,632
I Iove you, too.

1522
01:23:52,302 --> 01:23:54,178
I'm so proud of you, George.

1523
01:23:56,222 --> 01:23:57,514
That's good.

1524
01:23:57,640 --> 01:23:59,141
I'm closing an account.

1525
01:23:59,392 --> 01:24:04,146
Rita, it looks like you'll be
withdrawing $4 million from us today.

1526
01:24:04,230 --> 01:24:05,314
$4 million?

1527
01:24:05,398 --> 01:24:07,357
- Is that correct?
- Yes.

1528
01:24:07,901 --> 01:24:09,735
Well, how would you like that?

1529
01:24:10,487 --> 01:24:11,570
10s and 20s?

1530
01:24:11,988 --> 01:24:14,698
Hey, son. We watching Ghost.

1531
01:24:14,782 --> 01:24:17,326
She's gonna walk up in a bank
and act Iike she somebody else.

1532
01:24:17,410 --> 01:24:18,619
Look at that.

1533
01:24:18,703 --> 01:24:21,413
You know we require identification
and all that.

1534
01:24:21,498 --> 01:24:24,875
Rita Miller or Oda Mae Jones,
she don't even know what her name is.

1535
01:24:26,002 --> 01:24:28,879
Rita Miller. That's my name.

1536
01:24:29,339 --> 01:24:31,089
My name. Rita Miller.

1537
01:24:33,468 --> 01:24:34,968
My name.

1538
01:24:36,137 --> 01:24:37,763
The check.

1539
01:24:39,432 --> 01:24:40,474
Here you are.

1540
01:24:43,186 --> 01:24:46,063
What the hell you Iooking at me
Iike the Iast virgin for?

1541
01:24:50,902 --> 01:24:52,903
Now Iet me make sure I got this right.

1542
01:24:52,987 --> 01:24:55,405
Y'all want me to get on the aeroplane,

1543
01:24:55,490 --> 01:24:58,867
go out to New York City and go in a bank
and pretend to be Precious Jackson?

1544
01:25:00,161 --> 01:25:01,411
Is that right?

1545
01:25:01,496 --> 01:25:02,579
Yes.

1546
01:25:05,708 --> 01:25:07,584
Does Brian know anything about this?

1547
01:25:07,669 --> 01:25:10,170
- No.
- He thinks you both could go to jail.

1548
01:25:10,255 --> 01:25:12,339
Well, I could be going to jail anyway.

1549
01:25:12,423 --> 01:25:14,716
That's all right. Just don't drop the soap,
you'll be fine.

1550
01:25:14,801 --> 01:25:17,511
I been up in there. You might have to
fight a Iittle bit, kick a Iittle ass.

1551
01:25:17,595 --> 01:25:18,679
But you'll be all right.

1552
01:25:18,763 --> 01:25:20,764
If you don't kick no ass,
they gonna take your ass.

1553
01:25:20,848 --> 01:25:22,224
But you'll be all right.

1554
01:25:23,309 --> 01:25:25,185
I don't know about this, though.
I don't feel good about this.

1555
01:25:25,270 --> 01:25:26,979
I just don't... I don't know. I don't know.

1556
01:25:27,063 --> 01:25:29,147
Madea, it's easy.

1557
01:25:29,232 --> 01:25:31,900
It's just as easy as it was in the movie.

1558
01:25:32,735 --> 01:25:34,570
Whoopi Goldberg had a dead white man
helping her

1559
01:25:34,654 --> 01:25:36,196
all through that whole movie.

1560
01:25:36,281 --> 01:25:37,531
I'll help you.

1561
01:25:37,615 --> 01:25:39,741
You alive. I said dead!

1562
01:25:39,826 --> 01:25:41,118
George, you cannot go to New York.

1563
01:25:41,202 --> 01:25:42,286
Honey, I have to.

1564
01:25:42,370 --> 01:25:44,496
You can't. They're still after you.
Are you crazy?

1565
01:25:44,581 --> 01:25:46,373
I'll disguise myself somehow.

1566
01:25:46,457 --> 01:25:48,417
They won't know me. Okay? It'll be fine.

1567
01:25:48,501 --> 01:25:50,210
- No, I can't do that.
- Madea.

1568
01:25:50,295 --> 01:25:52,337
Please, I know you can do it.

1569
01:25:52,422 --> 01:25:54,464
You say this is for charity?

1570
01:25:54,591 --> 01:25:56,967
And for the church? Right, Jake?
For the church? It's for the church?

1571
01:25:57,093 --> 01:25:59,595
It's for the church, for your daddy
get the money back for the church?

1572
01:25:59,679 --> 01:26:02,639
AII right. Now my question then becomes,

1573
01:26:02,765 --> 01:26:05,726
all these beautiful people
that got these charities

1574
01:26:05,810 --> 01:26:08,770
and helping all these children
and feeding the people around the world,

1575
01:26:08,855 --> 01:26:11,982
it's for that, that's wonderful,
but I have a question for you.

1576
01:26:13,943 --> 01:26:16,028
What the hell in it for me?

1577
01:26:16,821 --> 01:26:20,115
Madea, you'll feel a Iot better about yourself.

1578
01:26:20,950 --> 01:26:24,453
I always feel good about myself.
Hell, I was born 6'2".

1579
01:26:24,954 --> 01:26:26,496
237 pounds.

1580
01:26:26,623 --> 01:26:30,208
I have always been this big all my Iife.
I went to kindergarten this big.

1581
01:26:30,376 --> 01:26:32,669
I had to have high self-esteem.
I feel good about myself.

1582
01:26:32,795 --> 01:26:35,005
Ain't nothing you gonna tell me
gonna make me feel good about myself.

1583
01:26:35,131 --> 01:26:37,049
You give me some money,
that'll make me feel good about myself.

1584
01:26:38,134 --> 01:26:39,426
Okay, you know what?

1585
01:26:39,510 --> 01:26:42,471
Can we figure that out after this is done?

1586
01:26:43,306 --> 01:26:45,474
George, have you ever hired a ho?

1587
01:26:48,353 --> 01:26:50,312
No. No.

1588
01:26:51,397 --> 01:26:53,440
She want her money first.
Do you understand?

1589
01:26:53,524 --> 01:26:54,858
I need to get some money first.

1590
01:26:54,984 --> 01:26:58,195
Don't perform no services
until the money's on the table.

1591
01:27:00,823 --> 01:27:03,909
You know what? I'll do it. I will do it.

1592
01:27:03,993 --> 01:27:05,452
AII I got to do is go in there

1593
01:27:05,536 --> 01:27:07,663
and give them a bunch of accounts
to transfer the money to?

1594
01:27:07,747 --> 01:27:08,997
- Yes.
- 12 accounts?

1595
01:27:09,082 --> 01:27:10,457
I just give them the information
to do the transfer?

1596
01:27:10,541 --> 01:27:11,792
That's it. That's all.

1597
01:27:11,876 --> 01:27:12,959
AII right, I'll do it.

1598
01:27:13,044 --> 01:27:16,338
Then I will gladly do it. So he just
gonna wire the money to the accounts?

1599
01:27:16,422 --> 01:27:18,715
- Yes.
- Okay, fine.

1600
01:27:18,841 --> 01:27:21,009
Come on, Iet's go. Where's my purse?
Y'all get my purse.

1601
01:27:21,094 --> 01:27:23,220
Joe, where's my purse?
We've got to go up to New York.

1602
01:27:23,346 --> 01:27:25,305
You know what? If you guys are gonna go,

1603
01:27:25,390 --> 01:27:27,474
she can't Iook Iike this,
she can't be wearing that.

1604
01:27:27,558 --> 01:27:29,017
- Right.
- What's wrong with what I got on?

1605
01:27:30,353 --> 01:27:33,647
This came from Aretha Franklin.
Aretha gave me this.

1606
01:27:33,731 --> 01:27:35,399
And y'all know Aretha can dress.

1607
01:27:35,525 --> 01:27:38,110
You've seen Aretha,
she makes fashion statements.

1608
01:27:38,194 --> 01:27:40,696
How about Barbara, Cindy and I
give you a makeover?

1609
01:27:43,700 --> 01:27:45,909
Introducing Precious Jackson.

1610
01:28:06,055 --> 01:28:07,222
Wow.

1611
01:28:09,267 --> 01:28:10,392
This might work.

1612
01:28:10,727 --> 01:28:14,020
No. I don't know what the hell
y'all are thinking.

1613
01:28:14,105 --> 01:28:16,732
You Iook Iike a big ass bottle
of Pepto-Bismol.

1614
01:28:34,292 --> 01:28:36,752
- Can I give you a hand, sir?
- Yes. The Iuggage.

1615
01:28:36,836 --> 01:28:38,253
The airport.

1616
01:28:38,337 --> 01:28:40,464
This bag. This way.

1617
01:28:40,590 --> 01:28:42,090
- Here we go?
- Yeah.

1618
01:28:42,175 --> 01:28:43,425
Okay.

1619
01:28:44,427 --> 01:28:45,594
Going to the airport.

1620
01:28:45,678 --> 01:28:47,512
- Right this way, ma'am.
- AII right, I'll follow you.

1621
01:28:47,597 --> 01:28:50,098
You ain't got to rush me,
I know where the hell I'm going.

1622
01:28:51,642 --> 01:28:53,268
The airport. A Iot of people here.

1623
01:28:53,770 --> 01:28:55,187
I'm nervous. I need to relax.

1624
01:28:55,271 --> 01:28:56,730
Well, there's nothing to be nervous about.

1625
01:28:56,814 --> 01:29:00,192
It's just Iike riding in a car,
except you're 30,000 feet higher.

1626
01:29:00,276 --> 01:29:02,903
Cars don't crash from 30,000 feet, George.

1627
01:29:02,987 --> 01:29:06,406
You need something to calm your nerves,
I got that old wee-wee.

1628
01:29:06,491 --> 01:29:08,116
Hey, what does that mean, drugs?

1629
01:29:08,201 --> 01:29:09,451
- Is that drugs?
- I know you ain't got no drugs.

1630
01:29:09,535 --> 01:29:10,619
- No drugs.
- If you got...

1631
01:29:10,703 --> 01:29:12,037
I'm gonna beat your ass
if you got them drugs.

1632
01:29:12,121 --> 01:29:13,205
You don't bring no drugs up in here.

1633
01:29:13,289 --> 01:29:15,123
- They got sniffing dogs up in here.
- No drugs.

1634
01:29:15,208 --> 01:29:17,709
Y'all go through.
I'm not going through with y'all.

1635
01:29:17,794 --> 01:29:20,045
I'm not going through.
Excuse me, y'all. Excuse me.

1636
01:29:20,129 --> 01:29:22,714
- I'm not going through with them at all.
- Madame, you are making a scene.

1637
01:29:22,799 --> 01:29:25,383
- Watch yourself. Watch yourself, here.
- That's a no, no.

1638
01:29:25,968 --> 01:29:29,971
Y'all go on.
I don't know them. I don't know them.

1639
01:29:30,473 --> 01:29:32,474
Hi. Hi. A Iittle scary.

1640
01:29:32,809 --> 01:29:35,143
When I'm finished doing,
this gonna be the bomb.

1641
01:29:35,478 --> 01:29:37,979
- Don't say "bomb." Don't say "bomb."
- What is the bomb?

1642
01:29:38,064 --> 01:29:40,315
- No, no, no.
- Don't say...

1643
01:29:40,399 --> 01:29:42,234
Hey, he don't want me saying "bomb."

1644
01:29:42,318 --> 01:29:43,485
Okay.

1645
01:29:45,530 --> 01:29:48,114
What do I do, just give him the ticket?

1646
01:29:48,199 --> 01:29:49,741
And show him my ID?

1647
01:29:49,826 --> 01:29:51,952
- Okay.
- That's the way.

1648
01:29:52,036 --> 01:29:54,037
Okay, that's me, and that's my ticket.

1649
01:29:54,163 --> 01:29:56,790
- That is the way.
- Okay, thank you so much.

1650
01:29:56,874 --> 01:29:58,708
AII right.

1651
01:29:58,835 --> 01:30:01,086
Now what y'all doing?

1652
01:30:01,170 --> 01:30:03,463
- What y'all doing?
- Taking off our shoes.

1653
01:30:03,548 --> 01:30:06,466
Take off your personal items
and put them in the tray.

1654
01:30:06,551 --> 01:30:09,135
What they gonna do
with my personal items?

1655
01:30:09,220 --> 01:30:10,387
Baby, I can't take off my shoe.

1656
01:30:10,513 --> 01:30:12,722
Do you know how hard it is for
a woman my size to take off her shoes?

1657
01:30:12,849 --> 01:30:14,182
I'm supposed to take off my shoes?

1658
01:30:14,308 --> 01:30:15,475
Yes, ma'am.

1659
01:30:16,185 --> 01:30:18,979
What the hell do I need
to be taking my shoes off for?

1660
01:30:20,189 --> 01:30:22,440
Baby, when you're this big,
it's hard to take your shoes off.

1661
01:30:22,525 --> 01:30:23,525
That's all I'm saying.

1662
01:30:23,651 --> 01:30:26,653
Take them off, but I don't know who the hell
gonna help me put them back on.

1663
01:30:26,737 --> 01:30:28,864
Y'all so serious.

1664
01:30:33,244 --> 01:30:34,870
Watch that now.

1665
01:30:39,083 --> 01:30:40,166
There you go.

1666
01:30:40,668 --> 01:30:42,878
Oh, Lord. And you just
push it through there?

1667
01:30:43,212 --> 01:30:45,338
- Now what I do? What I do?
- Right this way.

1668
01:30:45,423 --> 01:30:46,631
Right this way.

1669
01:30:46,716 --> 01:30:49,175
Okay. I'm gonna come on
through this thing.

1670
01:30:52,013 --> 01:30:54,222
- What the hell is that?
- Just step over here, please, ma'am.

1671
01:30:54,348 --> 01:30:55,515
What was that?

1672
01:30:55,600 --> 01:30:56,933
Just step over here through the scanner.

1673
01:30:58,019 --> 01:30:59,436
- What'd you want me to do?
- Step through here, please.

1674
01:30:59,562 --> 01:31:02,230
- Okay, all right.
- Right through the scanner.

1675
01:31:02,356 --> 01:31:04,441
Now what am I supposed to do?
This ain't gonna drop me down?

1676
01:31:04,567 --> 01:31:06,610
Just go and put your feet
in the footsteps, please.

1677
01:31:07,194 --> 01:31:10,238
That's really wide. You want me to put
both my feet where these yellow feet?

1678
01:31:10,364 --> 01:31:11,573
- Yes, ma'am.
- That's really wide.

1679
01:31:11,699 --> 01:31:14,075
My Iegs ain't been open that wide
since I had my daughter.

1680
01:31:15,745 --> 01:31:18,371
George, they want me to spread my Iegs.

1681
01:31:18,623 --> 01:31:19,998
Okay, fine.

1682
01:31:20,082 --> 01:31:22,292
- Now what?
- Put your hands over your head, please.

1683
01:31:22,418 --> 01:31:23,543
- Like this?
- That's it.

1684
01:31:23,628 --> 01:31:26,087
Hands over your head.

1685
01:31:26,213 --> 01:31:28,506
Wow, this is really sexual.

1686
01:31:28,591 --> 01:31:31,176
Reminds me back of my stripping days.

1687
01:31:31,260 --> 01:31:33,595
They used to call me Magnitude.

1688
01:31:35,222 --> 01:31:36,765
You see anything?

1689
01:31:38,601 --> 01:31:40,101
Can I have you step outside, please?

1690
01:31:40,227 --> 01:31:41,561
Step outside.

1691
01:31:41,646 --> 01:31:42,729
Right this way. Put your hands down.

1692
01:31:42,813 --> 01:31:44,564
- Can I close my Iegs?
- Yes, please.

1693
01:31:44,649 --> 01:31:46,608
Okay, thank you so much.

1694
01:31:47,318 --> 01:31:49,027
- Now what?
- Stand right over here, please.

1695
01:31:49,111 --> 01:31:51,196
- Yes.
- I'm just gonna do a quick pat down.

1696
01:31:51,280 --> 01:31:52,989
- On my body?
- Yes.

1697
01:31:53,115 --> 01:31:54,741
- Go ahead and raise your hands.
- Am I under arrest?

1698
01:31:54,825 --> 01:31:56,242
- No, ma'am.
- Why you patting me down?

1699
01:31:56,327 --> 01:31:58,203
- Just standard procedure.
- A standard...

1700
01:31:58,287 --> 01:32:00,372
- I got to do all this to get on the airplane?
- Yes, please.

1701
01:32:00,456 --> 01:32:02,624
George, I got to do all this
to get on the airplane?

1702
01:32:02,750 --> 01:32:05,752
Ma'am, it's just standard procedure.
I need you to put your hands up, please.

1703
01:32:05,836 --> 01:32:08,421
- Thank you.
- Go on, pat me down.

1704
01:32:08,506 --> 01:32:09,631
Now, wait a minute.

1705
01:32:10,132 --> 01:32:12,884
You gonna find a roadmap to heaven.
You better come on from up there now.

1706
01:32:12,969 --> 01:32:14,344
Come on up.

1707
01:32:15,346 --> 01:32:16,638
Turn around.

1708
01:32:16,764 --> 01:32:17,973
Can I put my hands down?

1709
01:32:18,099 --> 01:32:20,767
Now wait. Now what the hell you doing?

1710
01:32:21,143 --> 01:32:22,477
Boy.

1711
01:32:23,479 --> 01:32:25,772
Something back here
that you wanna tell me about?

1712
01:32:25,856 --> 01:32:29,442
Yes, that's my ass.
It's from wall-to-wall in this skirt.

1713
01:32:30,820 --> 01:32:33,613
We're clear. Go right ahead.

1714
01:32:33,698 --> 01:32:37,409
You need to buy me a cigarette or a drink
or something after doing all that to me.

1715
01:32:37,493 --> 01:32:38,535
You don't know me.

1716
01:32:38,661 --> 01:32:40,245
I ain't felt that many hands
all over my body

1717
01:32:40,329 --> 01:32:41,705
since I got off that train from Mexico.

1718
01:32:41,831 --> 01:32:43,331
Where's my purse and my shoes?

1719
01:32:49,505 --> 01:32:51,923
Anybody ever told you
you Iook Iike Beyoncé?

1720
01:32:52,008 --> 01:32:53,008
No.

1721
01:32:53,134 --> 01:32:55,510
Madea, I found my wifey.

1722
01:32:58,139 --> 01:32:59,597
Shut the hell up back there. You in coach.

1723
01:32:59,682 --> 01:33:01,683
You ain't supposed to talk
to nobody in first class.

1724
01:33:01,809 --> 01:33:04,269
Didn't you see Titanic?

1725
01:33:04,353 --> 01:33:05,729
I'm nervous.

1726
01:33:05,855 --> 01:33:07,689
I know. But behave.

1727
01:33:09,316 --> 01:33:10,567
What the hell was that? What was that?

1728
01:33:11,861 --> 01:33:14,029
There better not be no terrorer on this plane.
Is there a terrorer?

1729
01:33:14,363 --> 01:33:17,198
Is there terrorer on here?
Better not be no terrorer.

1730
01:33:17,867 --> 01:33:19,868
Madea, it's a bump. Bump, bump.

1731
01:33:19,994 --> 01:33:21,786
What the hell a bump doing in the air?
Bumps are on the road.

1732
01:33:21,871 --> 01:33:23,788
- That's all.
- Bumps ain't in the air. Hell.

1733
01:33:23,873 --> 01:33:26,374
This thing just makes me nervous.
I don't Iike being on this thing.

1734
01:33:26,500 --> 01:33:30,295
I got to pee. I need something to relax me.
Calm me down.

1735
01:33:30,379 --> 01:33:31,671
What do you want? What do you want?

1736
01:33:31,756 --> 01:33:34,215
I want a joint.

1737
01:33:34,341 --> 01:33:37,594
- You need that good-good, Madea?
- Boy, shut up.

1738
01:33:37,720 --> 01:33:39,721
Just get me a drink. Can I get a drink?

1739
01:33:39,847 --> 01:33:42,098
Can they get a Iady a drink?
Can a colored woman get a drink?

1740
01:33:42,224 --> 01:33:43,558
I'll get a flight attendant.

1741
01:33:43,684 --> 01:33:46,352
I'll get her. Flight attendant?

1742
01:33:46,437 --> 01:33:50,231
Flight attendant? Flight attendant?
Flight attendant?

1743
01:33:50,357 --> 01:33:52,192
Ma'am, are you okay?

1744
01:33:52,276 --> 01:33:55,403
You're making the other passengers
just a Iittle bit nervous, okay?

1745
01:33:55,529 --> 01:33:56,613
I would Iike something to drink, please.

1746
01:33:56,739 --> 01:33:58,573
'Cause I need something
to relax me just a Iittle bit.

1747
01:33:58,699 --> 01:33:59,741
Okay. What would you Iike?

1748
01:33:59,867 --> 01:34:01,284
That depends. How much is it?

1749
01:34:01,410 --> 01:34:02,827
You're in first class, it's free.

1750
01:34:02,912 --> 01:34:04,829
Okay. Well, bring me every damn thing
you got back there.

1751
01:34:04,914 --> 01:34:05,955
If it's brown, pour it.

1752
01:34:25,893 --> 01:34:29,437
Lord have mercy, I ain't never
seen no place Iike this before.

1753
01:34:30,147 --> 01:34:32,649
They call it the Big Apple, huh?

1754
01:34:33,109 --> 01:34:36,402
I wonder why they call it the Big Apple.
I don't see no apples.

1755
01:34:36,487 --> 01:34:38,571
- Do you see the apples anywhere?
- No.

1756
01:34:42,076 --> 01:34:45,245
I wanna see that thing, too,
that thing with the torch on it.

1757
01:34:45,329 --> 01:34:48,373
The statue. The Statue of Limitations.

1758
01:34:49,250 --> 01:34:50,542
Lord, Iook at all these people.

1759
01:34:50,626 --> 01:34:52,460
I ain't never seen this many
people in one place

1760
01:34:52,545 --> 01:34:54,087
unless they be giving away
government cheese.

1761
01:34:54,171 --> 01:34:57,674
I don't understand why folk would be
all on top of each other Iike this.

1762
01:34:58,008 --> 01:35:00,176
This is too much.
I got to get back to Georgia.

1763
01:35:00,261 --> 01:35:02,053
Come on,
Iet's go get this business done.

1764
01:35:10,521 --> 01:35:13,148
New York!

1765
01:35:13,232 --> 01:35:15,066
Yes indeed, y'all. This is nice.

1766
01:35:15,151 --> 01:35:17,277
- Yeah, I'm in New York, baby.
- How you doing?

1767
01:35:17,361 --> 01:35:19,154
Hello, madame. May I take your bags?

1768
01:35:19,238 --> 01:35:21,322
- Where you gonna take it?
- I'll take it to your room, if you Iike.

1769
01:35:21,407 --> 01:35:24,993
- No. No. No, no.
- She is world-traveled.

1770
01:35:25,077 --> 01:35:28,663
She never think about the Iuggage.

1771
01:35:28,747 --> 01:35:29,914
I don't think about no Iuggage.

1772
01:35:29,999 --> 01:35:33,251
I don't think about no Iuggage
or the garbage or none of that stuff.

1773
01:35:33,335 --> 01:35:34,586
- This way.
- Okay.

1774
01:35:34,670 --> 01:35:37,088
Well, get on out of the way there.
Let a Iady pass.

1775
01:35:37,173 --> 01:35:40,425
You in the way, George, move.
Let them open the door for me.

1776
01:35:44,138 --> 01:35:46,306
Thank you. Thank you so much.

1777
01:35:46,974 --> 01:35:50,602
This place is Iovely. Hello.
Welcome. Thank you. Welcome.

1778
01:35:50,686 --> 01:35:53,021
Welcome to me. My first time here.

1779
01:35:53,105 --> 01:35:54,939
Hello. Hello.

1780
01:35:55,024 --> 01:35:59,068
They take dogs. Well, Oprah Winfrey
must stay here. Is she here?

1781
01:35:59,153 --> 01:36:00,653
This is Iovely.

1782
01:36:00,738 --> 01:36:03,448
Run into me one more time,
and I'm gonna knock the hell out of you.

1783
01:36:03,532 --> 01:36:06,034
What the hell's wrong with you?

1784
01:36:06,118 --> 01:36:07,869
Good afternoon, sir.

1785
01:36:07,953 --> 01:36:10,872
A reservation for Jackson.

1786
01:36:10,956 --> 01:36:13,708
- Of course. Good afternoon, madam.
- Hello.

1787
01:36:13,792 --> 01:36:15,126
I have the reservation.

1788
01:36:15,211 --> 01:36:17,837
I have your
credit card information on file.

1789
01:36:17,922 --> 01:36:19,714
And here are your keys.

1790
01:36:20,758 --> 01:36:24,636
And if you would be so kind as to sign here
at the bottom of this form.

1791
01:36:24,720 --> 01:36:26,262
But of course.

1792
01:36:26,347 --> 01:36:28,348
- But of course.
- Lovely accent.

1793
01:36:28,432 --> 01:36:30,183
- Yes.
- Yes.

1794
01:36:30,267 --> 01:36:32,727
Yes. The reservation
is under Precious Jackson.

1795
01:36:32,811 --> 01:36:35,480
That is my name.
I'm one of the Jackson family.

1796
01:36:35,564 --> 01:36:38,066
- Well, really? That's wonderful, madam.
- Yes, yes.

1797
01:36:38,150 --> 01:36:39,484
Yes. Excellent.

1798
01:36:39,568 --> 01:36:43,238
Well, it was La Toya
and Rebbie and me. Yeah.

1799
01:36:43,322 --> 01:36:44,989
- And Janet. Little Janet.
- Wonderful.

1800
01:36:45,074 --> 01:36:47,909
- We are so proud to have you here, madam.
- Thank you so much.

1801
01:36:47,993 --> 01:36:50,161
Excuse me. Excuse me.

1802
01:36:50,246 --> 01:36:52,413
Back the hell up. Thank you.

1803
01:36:52,498 --> 01:36:57,252
If I have a phone call from Janet or La Toya
or Rebbie Jackson...

1804
01:36:57,336 --> 01:36:59,045
- Yes, madam?
- ...please put them through.

1805
01:36:59,129 --> 01:37:01,464
- They're always calling me, all the time.
- I see.

1806
01:37:01,548 --> 01:37:03,466
'Cause they need makeup tips and advice.

1807
01:37:03,550 --> 01:37:05,176
- I'll put them right through to your room.
- Yes, thanks.

1808
01:37:05,261 --> 01:37:06,970
- I will do that, madam. Yes.
- Thank you so much. Thank you.

1809
01:37:07,054 --> 01:37:10,181
- Shall we go?
- The elevators are to your Ieft.

1810
01:37:10,266 --> 01:37:12,141
And I do hope you enjoy your stay.

1811
01:37:12,226 --> 01:37:13,935
- Well, yes, we will. Thank you so much.
- Yes, wonderful.

1812
01:37:14,019 --> 01:37:15,853
- Thank you so much.
- Don't fall over.

1813
01:37:17,398 --> 01:37:20,066
You hit me with these bags one more time,
I will knock the hell out of you.

1814
01:37:20,150 --> 01:37:22,068
- What's in here?
- Get the hell on the elevator.

1815
01:37:22,152 --> 01:37:23,569
You got two midgets in here.

1816
01:37:26,907 --> 01:37:30,159
If Randy or Jermaine or Tito call,

1817
01:37:30,244 --> 01:37:34,163
tell them I just cannot talk right now,
I'm gonna have to call them Iater.

1818
01:37:34,248 --> 01:37:35,415
Very good, madam. I have that.

1819
01:37:35,499 --> 01:37:37,041
What the hell you
pulling me for, George?

1820
01:37:41,922 --> 01:37:44,007
I know how to open the door, here. This...

1821
01:37:44,550 --> 01:37:46,217
This is nice.

1822
01:37:47,511 --> 01:37:50,138
Oh, Lord, this furniture nice.

1823
01:37:50,222 --> 01:37:52,348
Ain't got no plastic on it.
Can't be too nice, though.

1824
01:37:52,683 --> 01:37:54,100
- How you doing?
- Good.

1825
01:37:54,184 --> 01:37:56,561
- Wonderful. Hello.
- Hello.

1826
01:37:57,229 --> 01:37:58,980
Your chocolate.

1827
01:37:59,064 --> 01:38:01,065
Yes, I know I'm chocolate.

1828
01:38:01,775 --> 01:38:05,903
That's a new way of saying "black"?
I'm chocolate, yes. African-American.

1829
01:38:06,405 --> 01:38:11,409
Forgive madame.
She is, how you say, preoccupée.

1830
01:38:11,869 --> 01:38:15,121
You gonna stop calling me madame.
My name is Madea, not madame.

1831
01:38:15,622 --> 01:38:16,956
Zip it.

1832
01:38:17,833 --> 01:38:20,585
- For you, monsieur. Thank you.
- Thank you. Thank you.

1833
01:38:22,129 --> 01:38:23,379
What the hell was he just
standing up here for,

1834
01:38:23,464 --> 01:38:25,089
just Iooking all scary and weird?

1835
01:38:25,174 --> 01:38:26,424
I thought I had
checked into the Bates Motel.

1836
01:38:26,508 --> 01:38:27,508
He's standing there Iike that.

1837
01:38:27,843 --> 01:38:30,219
- What was he waiting for?
- A gratuity.

1838
01:38:30,929 --> 01:38:33,097
- What is that?
- A tip.

1839
01:38:33,182 --> 01:38:35,266
Why didn't you just say "tip"?
I know what the hell a tip is.

1840
01:38:35,351 --> 01:38:38,478
Now, George, how much did you just
give that man? You gave him paper money.

1841
01:38:38,562 --> 01:38:40,480
- How much was that?
- Twenty.

1842
01:38:41,648 --> 01:38:43,024
Twenty what?

1843
01:38:43,108 --> 01:38:44,650
Dollars. $20.

1844
01:38:45,694 --> 01:38:47,445
Have you Iost your mind, George?

1845
01:38:47,529 --> 01:38:49,989
Waiter! Excuse me. Excuse me, sir.

1846
01:38:50,074 --> 01:38:53,826
Hello, mister. Can I talk to you
forjust a second?

1847
01:38:53,911 --> 01:38:56,162
Mister? I'm tired as hell.

1848
01:38:56,246 --> 01:38:59,248
Here. Hold this for me, baby,
and Iet me hold that. That's $20.

1849
01:38:59,333 --> 01:39:02,502
Baby, Iisten, if we wanted that for chocolate,
we'd go get us a Snickers.

1850
01:39:02,586 --> 01:39:03,628
Here's your tip.

1851
01:39:03,712 --> 01:39:05,630
Pardon, monsieur, she is...

1852
01:39:07,466 --> 01:39:10,718
- Movez-vous. Movez-vous.
- Go on. Go on. $20?

1853
01:39:10,803 --> 01:39:14,389
Would you get a grip?
You've got to play the part.

1854
01:39:14,473 --> 01:39:16,724
Trust me. Appearance is everything. Okay?

1855
01:39:16,809 --> 01:39:18,017
Now, we need to get some rest

1856
01:39:18,102 --> 01:39:21,104
so we can get to the bank early
and get out of here.

1857
01:39:21,188 --> 01:39:22,855
That's fine.
Let's get some rest, then, George.

1858
01:39:22,940 --> 01:39:25,358
But you ain't gonna give no $20 to nobody.
That's just damn crazy.

1859
01:39:25,442 --> 01:39:27,735
Child, if Joe could see me now.

1860
01:39:30,030 --> 01:39:32,031
This mattress is nice.

1861
01:39:33,200 --> 01:39:35,618
No, can't Iay down flat Iike that.

1862
01:39:36,870 --> 01:39:40,248
Yeah. Women who is well-endowed
can't Iay flat.

1863
01:39:41,333 --> 01:39:43,000
'Cause them breasts will
sneak up around your neck

1864
01:39:43,085 --> 01:39:45,378
and choke the hell out of you
through the night.

1865
01:39:45,462 --> 01:39:48,047
Got to throw them over to the side.

1866
01:39:49,216 --> 01:39:50,675
This is nice.

1867
01:39:52,386 --> 01:39:54,345
Silk.

1868
01:39:57,349 --> 01:39:59,142
Okay, here we go. Here we go.

1869
01:39:59,226 --> 01:40:00,893
Now remember, you're Precious Jackson,

1870
01:40:00,978 --> 01:40:03,938
and you wanna get all the money
transferred into the 12 accounts.

1871
01:40:04,022 --> 01:40:05,523
You can't keep running this
over and over again.

1872
01:40:05,607 --> 01:40:07,984
- You're gonna make me forget everything.
- Okay. This is it. This is it.

1873
01:40:08,068 --> 01:40:09,735
I understand.
You gonna make me forget everything.

1874
01:40:09,820 --> 01:40:11,195
I can't keep doing this over and over again.

1875
01:40:11,280 --> 01:40:13,281
- Just relax.
- AII right, I got it.

1876
01:40:13,365 --> 01:40:17,410
I'm relaxed, George, I'm relaxed.
But you tensing me the hell up.

1877
01:40:17,494 --> 01:40:19,495
- Okay. Okay.
- Okay.

1878
01:40:19,580 --> 01:40:21,706
- Got it?
- I got it. I got it.

1879
01:40:27,045 --> 01:40:28,087
Madea.

1880
01:40:29,965 --> 01:40:30,965
Yes?

1881
01:40:31,925 --> 01:40:37,388
Remember, the man you're meeting,
his name is Jack Goldenberg.

1882
01:40:38,515 --> 01:40:40,766
What the hell you speaking
a French accent for, George?

1883
01:40:40,851 --> 01:40:41,976
This is me and you talking.

1884
01:40:42,060 --> 01:40:43,519
Hell, I know how to speak French, too.

1885
01:40:45,689 --> 01:40:46,772
Shut the hell up.

1886
01:40:46,857 --> 01:40:50,610
I got it. Jack Goldenberg.

1887
01:40:50,694 --> 01:40:52,361
- Thank you.
- Okay.

1888
01:40:54,656 --> 01:40:57,116
Excuse me while I do my Tyra Banks.

1889
01:41:12,049 --> 01:41:13,257
Hello.

1890
01:41:15,594 --> 01:41:19,263
Can you help me?
I'm here to see Whoopi Goldberg.

1891
01:41:20,432 --> 01:41:21,766
Excuse me?

1892
01:41:24,019 --> 01:41:27,438
Silly me. I'm sorry.
I was just watching The View.

1893
01:41:27,523 --> 01:41:33,319
I'm here to see Jack Goldenberg.
Jack Goldenberg.

1894
01:41:33,403 --> 01:41:35,696
- May I tell him who's here?
- Yes...

1895
01:41:36,865 --> 01:41:39,742
I'm sorry, I was about to say,
"What a mighty God we serve."

1896
01:41:41,370 --> 01:41:45,122
Precious Jackson is my name.
I'm a part of the Jackson family.

1897
01:41:45,207 --> 01:41:47,625
Yes. But, you know,
they put me on the outskirts.

1898
01:41:47,709 --> 01:41:50,253
- So now, it's just me and Bubbles.
- Bubbles.

1899
01:41:50,379 --> 01:41:51,629
- Yeah, yeah.
- That the monkey?

1900
01:41:51,713 --> 01:41:53,172
- Yeah, great Iittle monkey.
- Oh, my God.

1901
01:41:53,257 --> 01:41:57,051
Yeah. I call him Joe,
but everybody else calls him Bubbles.

1902
01:41:58,387 --> 01:41:59,762
You certainly do have an appointment.

1903
01:42:00,806 --> 01:42:03,224
Precious Jackson to see you.

1904
01:42:03,308 --> 01:42:06,143
Hello. Hi. Thank you so much, Magdalene.

1905
01:42:06,228 --> 01:42:07,812
- It's so great to see you.
- How can I help you?

1906
01:42:07,896 --> 01:42:11,524
Jack, I called you.

1907
01:42:11,608 --> 01:42:15,111
We spoke about all the transfers
that I need to do.

1908
01:42:15,237 --> 01:42:19,240
I got that request Iast evening. Let me see.

1909
01:42:19,324 --> 01:42:22,702
Jack, can we do this? I'd Iike
to add one more account to that.

1910
01:42:22,786 --> 01:42:25,788
Because I'm feeling so generous
and I've given to so many charities.

1911
01:42:25,914 --> 01:42:29,125
Here is the account number.
I know that's 12, this'll be the 13th.

1912
01:42:29,418 --> 01:42:31,335
- Thirteenth?
- Yes.

1913
01:42:31,420 --> 01:42:35,006
And, of course, in this economic climate,
you're gonna need my identification.

1914
01:42:35,090 --> 01:42:36,549
Precious Jackson. Here you are.

1915
01:42:36,633 --> 01:42:38,259
- Well, thank you.
- Okay.

1916
01:42:40,095 --> 01:42:41,554
She's been in there way too Iong.

1917
01:42:41,638 --> 01:42:43,639
She's not. She hasn't been,
and she's doing a mission.

1918
01:42:43,765 --> 01:42:45,725
Very dangerous work she's doing.

1919
01:42:45,809 --> 01:42:48,144
You're just...
You know what? You're such a...

1920
01:42:48,270 --> 01:42:50,980
I'd hate to be cliff-diving with you.

1921
01:42:58,697 --> 01:43:00,573
Look, I saw this in a movie once.

1922
01:43:00,657 --> 01:43:03,075
You go east, I go west,
we meet in the subway.

1923
01:43:03,160 --> 01:43:04,201
We'll make it out alive.

1924
01:43:04,286 --> 01:43:07,246
I'm not running with you. Okay?

1925
01:43:07,331 --> 01:43:10,541
I'm not running down the street
Iike some biatch.

1926
01:43:10,626 --> 01:43:12,585
Like some biatch, okay?

1927
01:43:12,669 --> 01:43:14,920
Wait. What are you talking about, fool?

1928
01:43:15,005 --> 01:43:17,173
I'm committed to see this through.

1929
01:43:17,299 --> 01:43:19,342
You know what they'll do with you
with that mustache in jail?

1930
01:43:19,468 --> 01:43:21,302
You better not snitch.

1931
01:43:21,970 --> 01:43:23,596
- Please.
- You kill me.

1932
01:43:23,680 --> 01:43:24,764
- There she is.
- Oh, my goodness.

1933
01:43:24,848 --> 01:43:28,059
- Jack, you kill me.
- Now, our cover.

1934
01:43:28,143 --> 01:43:29,518
- Yes, thank you.
- She got it.

1935
01:43:29,645 --> 01:43:33,230
But if there's anything else you need,
you call Jack Goldenberg directly.

1936
01:43:33,315 --> 01:43:35,024
I certainly will. I certainly will.

1937
01:43:35,359 --> 01:43:37,151
- May I help you?
- Oh, you're delightful.

1938
01:43:37,277 --> 01:43:39,362
- What a Iovely woman.
- No. I've got it. I've got it.

1939
01:43:39,488 --> 01:43:41,614
You got to stop flirting with me.
You ain't getting nothing.

1940
01:43:41,698 --> 01:43:44,533
I see you Iooking at my ass.
Don't you do that. Don't you do that.

1941
01:43:44,660 --> 01:43:46,702
- I would never do that.
- Stop that flirting with me.

1942
01:43:46,828 --> 01:43:48,829
- What a woman. What a woman.
- Thank you so much.

1943
01:43:48,955 --> 01:43:51,332
- I'll see you Iater. AII right.
- Well, our pleasure again.

1944
01:43:51,458 --> 01:43:52,667
- Did you get it?
- Yes.

1945
01:43:52,793 --> 01:43:54,543
- Let's go.
- Yes.

1946
01:44:06,139 --> 01:44:08,683
Thank you very much, sir. Thank you.

1947
01:44:09,351 --> 01:44:11,143
Well, what did he say?

1948
01:44:11,520 --> 01:44:17,233
Well, he's not very happy and neither am I
that you took my aunt up to New York.

1949
01:44:17,359 --> 01:44:19,068
To that bank. That's crazy.

1950
01:44:19,194 --> 01:44:22,446
But he's getting a Iot of calls
from the charities, they're very happy.

1951
01:44:22,531 --> 01:44:26,200
The press is very excited about it,
so he's okay, and so am I.

1952
01:44:26,702 --> 01:44:29,453
Well, what does that mean for me?

1953
01:44:29,538 --> 01:44:32,957
You've helped us gather enough information
and evidence against your former bosses

1954
01:44:33,041 --> 01:44:35,209
that we got a pretty solid case.

1955
01:44:35,335 --> 01:44:36,919
With that information, we pressured them,

1956
01:44:37,045 --> 01:44:39,004
and they've agreed to testify
against the Malone family,

1957
01:44:39,089 --> 01:44:40,131
so they won't be after you.

1958
01:44:40,215 --> 01:44:43,718
So we just talked about
dropping the charges against you.

1959
01:44:44,261 --> 01:44:47,346
What you did,
getting those accounts back in order,

1960
01:44:47,431 --> 01:44:50,766
and having all that money wired
back to the charities, all 13 of them,

1961
01:44:52,018 --> 01:44:53,811
it's really great.

1962
01:44:53,895 --> 01:44:57,523
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it was.

1963
01:44:57,607 --> 01:44:58,899
You're free to go, George.

1964
01:44:59,025 --> 01:45:00,901
- So I'm free?
- Yeah.

1965
01:45:01,987 --> 01:45:03,070
Enjoy your Iife, George.

1966
01:45:03,155 --> 01:45:06,073
Take care of yourself.
Stay out of trouble.

1967
01:45:06,158 --> 01:45:14,665
Thank you.

1968
01:45:15,250 --> 01:45:16,751
The other way.

1969
01:45:17,878 --> 01:45:19,211
Thank you.

1970
01:45:21,506 --> 01:45:24,925
This has been Iovely.
It's just been so fun having y'all here.

1971
01:45:25,010 --> 01:45:27,261
Madea, thank you.

1972
01:45:27,387 --> 01:45:29,013
Thanks for everything.

1973
01:45:29,097 --> 01:45:31,849
You have no idea how much
I wanna say, "Get the hell out."

1974
01:45:31,933 --> 01:45:34,852
But I'm holding that in, because
I'm showing so much Iove to you.

1975
01:45:34,936 --> 01:45:36,353
I enjoyed having y'all here.

1976
01:45:36,438 --> 01:45:38,397
The best part about company
is when they Ieave.

1977
01:45:38,774 --> 01:45:40,900
I'm gonna miss you so much, Madea.

1978
01:45:41,276 --> 01:45:45,279
That's okay, child. AII them potatoes
in my house is glad you Ieaving.

1979
01:45:45,363 --> 01:45:46,864
- Me, too.
- Yeah?

1980
01:45:46,948 --> 01:45:48,616
Can we come back and visit?

1981
01:45:50,952 --> 01:45:52,953
That is so sweet.
You wanna come back and visit?

1982
01:45:53,038 --> 01:45:55,539
No, I don't think so. I'm sorry.

1983
01:45:55,624 --> 01:45:56,707
You can write me Ietters, though.

1984
01:45:56,792 --> 01:46:00,878
Long, Iong, Iong Ietters. Dissertations
from very, very, very far away.

1985
01:46:00,962 --> 01:46:02,379
Negros.

1986
01:46:06,760 --> 01:46:09,386
Okay, time to get her the hell out of here.

1987
01:46:09,471 --> 01:46:11,806
- Spirituals.
- Now she gets it.

1988
01:46:11,932 --> 01:46:15,142
Okay, Mom, Iet's go. One Iast time.

1989
01:46:15,227 --> 01:46:16,560
Let's go.

1990
01:46:17,938 --> 01:46:20,231
There's my boy. There's my boy.

1991
01:46:20,315 --> 01:46:22,274
Bye, Joe. I'll be back.

1992
01:46:23,151 --> 01:46:25,653
I'll be back, Joe. Bye.

1993
01:46:25,779 --> 01:46:27,321
- Y'all, come on.
- Bye.

1994
01:46:27,405 --> 01:46:29,323
Mabel, get them the hell out of here now.

1995
01:46:29,407 --> 01:46:30,574
I'll see y'all around.

1996
01:46:31,117 --> 01:46:32,993
Bye. Bye.

1997
01:46:33,119 --> 01:46:34,453
- Bye.
- Bye.

1998
01:46:48,969 --> 01:46:49,969
Yes!

1999
01:47:03,149 --> 01:47:04,817
- Love you, Dad.
- Love you, Son.

2000
01:47:41,563 --> 01:47:42,563
Yeah!

2001
01:47:43,440 --> 01:47:45,357
I did that. I got that money, baby.

2002
01:47:45,483 --> 01:47:48,569
I got that money!

2003
01:47:53,825 --> 01:47:55,534
I don't want to go to prison,
because, you know?

2004
01:47:55,619 --> 01:47:57,703
Food is bad,
I'm probably gonna Iose weight.

2005
01:47:57,787 --> 01:48:00,581
Probably go down to nothing
and get gang-raped.

2006
01:48:00,665 --> 01:48:02,583
I don't wanna shower in prison.

2007
01:48:02,667 --> 01:48:06,378
They can do strange things to you in prison.

2008
01:48:06,463 --> 01:48:08,088
Do you understand? Do you understand?

2009
01:48:08,173 --> 01:48:12,468
I think I can handle myself. I really do.

2010
01:48:12,594 --> 01:48:15,262
I really do. I just don't want
to go through the experience

2011
01:48:15,347 --> 01:48:17,431
of having to do that. Okay?

2012
01:48:17,515 --> 01:48:19,934
I don't want to have to worry
about other guys in there.

2013
01:48:20,018 --> 01:48:23,312
When I get so mad,
I'm gonna have to use my fists,

2014
01:48:23,396 --> 01:48:25,814
you know, just to defend myself.

2015
01:48:25,899 --> 01:48:28,192
Go upstairs and get your mom's pills.

2016
01:48:28,276 --> 01:48:32,112
- Find a Iittle straitjacket and calm down...
- And a straitjacket, too.

2017
01:48:32,197 --> 01:48:33,822
Figure this out, Maysie.

2018
01:48:33,907 --> 01:48:35,366
And then you put in that fatback grease,

2019
01:48:35,450 --> 01:48:37,743
and you make sure it just sits there
and soak, so it'll be Iight.

2020
01:48:37,827 --> 01:48:39,203
I got some oatmeal on the stove,

2021
01:48:39,287 --> 01:48:41,372
and I got some greens
that's gonna clean you out.

2022
01:48:41,456 --> 01:48:43,082
It's Iike none of this is gonna matter.

2023
01:48:44,584 --> 01:48:45,626
AII right.

2024
01:48:45,710 --> 01:48:48,253
That's pretty good for never doing it.

2025
01:48:49,047 --> 01:48:50,297
Oh, boy.

2026
01:48:51,716 --> 01:48:54,093
- Is she doing it, too? Wow.
- Yeah.

2027
01:48:54,636 --> 01:48:56,553
She kept her promise.

2028
01:48:56,638 --> 01:48:58,597
- What the hell? Charlie Sheen.
- Hey. What a surprise.

2029
01:48:58,682 --> 01:49:01,016
How are you? Look who back here.
Look who back here hiding.

2030
01:49:01,101 --> 01:49:02,142
It's Charlie Sheen.

2031
01:49:02,227 --> 01:49:03,644
- Big fan.
- I'm a big fan of yours, too.

2032
01:49:03,728 --> 01:49:04,895
I've wanted to do this ever since... I'm sorry.

2033
01:49:04,980 --> 01:49:07,564
- That's freaky. That's freaky. That's freaky.
- Damn. Sorry, sorry.

2034
01:49:07,649 --> 01:49:10,234
Go on. Go on, rest yourself. Rest yourself.

2035
01:49:10,318 --> 01:49:12,778
- No motorboating. No motorboating.
- Cut.

2036
01:49:13,446 --> 01:49:14,571
Where's Howie?

2037
01:49:14,656 --> 01:49:16,865
Oh, God, you don't even want to know
what happened to Howie.

2038
01:49:16,950 --> 01:49:18,575
It was so awful.

2039
01:49:18,660 --> 01:49:21,370
They just told me there was
a buffalo and a monkey somewhere,

2040
01:49:21,454 --> 01:49:25,207
and I just have not been able to figure
how they got out of the zoo.

2041
01:49:25,291 --> 01:49:26,792
I'm sorry.

2042
01:49:28,086 --> 01:49:30,713
I am 6'4" tall and a woman.

2043
01:49:30,797 --> 01:49:32,798
Do you think I have self-esteem issues?

2044
01:49:32,882 --> 01:49:35,592
I ain't never played for the WNBA,
but I could.

2045
01:49:35,677 --> 01:49:37,469
I ain't got no self-esteem issues, hell.

2046
01:49:37,554 --> 01:49:41,223
I got a mustache. Do you understand?
I'm a dude up under this stuff.

2047
01:49:41,725 --> 01:49:45,644
Sorry, this is Precious Jackson.
I'm in the Presidential Suite.

2048
01:49:45,895 --> 01:49:49,106
And there are two toilets here.

2049
01:49:49,190 --> 01:49:53,402
And I was trying to figure out,
which one am I supposed to use?

2050
01:49:53,486 --> 01:49:58,365
I don't know which one suits me best.
One of them has things on it Iike a faucet.

2051
01:49:58,992 --> 01:50:00,701
What is that for?

2052
01:50:03,288 --> 01:50:05,456
Yes, you know how you turn on the faucet.

2053
01:50:08,126 --> 01:50:10,836
I'm not a sir, I'm a ma'am.
You don't hear me, honey?

2054
01:50:12,213 --> 01:50:15,049
Okay, yes, there's two toilets here.

2055
01:50:15,133 --> 01:50:18,427
There's one that I recognize and
then there's one that I don't recognize.

2056
01:50:18,511 --> 01:50:22,347
It's got two handles on it, Iike you gonna
wash your hands or something.

2057
01:50:22,432 --> 01:50:24,266
A bidet? What is a bidet, honey?

2058
01:50:24,350 --> 01:50:28,228
I don't need Bengays and all that stuff.
Just trying to figure out what the toilet is.

2059
01:50:34,360 --> 01:50:36,153
Right. Your hands?

2060
01:50:38,364 --> 01:50:40,407
It's for washing your ass?

2061
01:50:43,953 --> 01:50:46,246
No, when I wanna wash my ass,
I take a bath, honey.

2062
01:50:46,331 --> 01:50:48,540
That's just nasty. Now who'd do that?

2063
01:50:51,419 --> 01:50:53,879
Listen, I didn't know
you were gonna answer the phone.

2064
01:50:53,963 --> 01:50:56,465
I thought the phone was disconnected.
I'm so sorry.

2065
01:50:56,549 --> 01:50:58,926
Okay. I'll talk to you Iater. Bye.

2066
01:51:00,428 --> 01:51:01,845
There was actually somebody there?

2067
01:51:01,930 --> 01:51:04,890
Yes. Yes, the whole time.

2068
01:51:04,974 --> 01:51:07,851
She was trying to explain to me what it was.

2069
01:51:08,311 --> 01:51:11,730
I'd Iike to order one of your famous...

2070
01:51:13,525 --> 01:51:17,152
Baby, this say hamburgers $45.
What the hell is on the burger?

2071
01:51:18,404 --> 01:51:22,032
No, no, no. For $45,
there better be more than a hamburger.

2072
01:51:23,535 --> 01:51:27,913
For $45, it better get up in this bed
and roll around with me for a Iittle while.

2073
01:51:29,249 --> 01:51:31,625
You don't think that's funny. Okay.

2074
01:51:31,709 --> 01:51:35,129
No. Do you have chicken wings?

2075
01:51:37,257 --> 01:51:38,298
You don't do those.

2076
01:51:38,383 --> 01:51:41,468
Well, maybe you can ask the chef
to prepare them for me, then.

2077
01:51:42,554 --> 01:51:43,762
Yes.

2078
01:51:43,847 --> 01:51:48,100
How many would I Iike? That depends.
How many are there in the order?

2079
01:51:49,727 --> 01:51:53,647
Okay, seven chicken wings. Okay.
How much are the seven chicken wings?

2080
01:51:57,235 --> 01:51:58,610
$30 a wing?

2081
01:51:59,904 --> 01:52:01,864
30 damn dollars a wing?

2082
01:52:03,158 --> 01:52:05,742
You crazy as hell. People pay that?

2083
01:52:06,536 --> 01:52:09,329
No, honey, I can't.
$30 for a damn chicken wing?

2084
01:52:09,414 --> 01:52:10,914
Do you know that I can get 20 of them,

2085
01:52:10,999 --> 01:52:13,792
they come in a pack,
20 for $1 .99 down at Roscoe's?

2086
01:52:13,877 --> 01:52:16,962
I can't have this, honey.
No, I'm gonna starve in this hotel.

2087
01:52:17,463 --> 01:52:22,593
My name is Precious Jackson.

2088
01:52:23,428 --> 01:52:26,221
My name is Melinda.

2089
01:52:26,890 --> 01:52:28,557
Hello, I'm Precious Jackson.

2090
01:52:28,641 --> 01:52:31,476
Yo. Yo, what's up? I'm Precious.
They call me Precious.

2091
01:52:45,116 --> 01:52:47,701
I thought you were, you know,
some tough guy from the hood?

2092
01:52:47,785 --> 01:52:49,912
You know, "My biggest nightmare."

2093
01:52:49,996 --> 01:52:53,540
Thug Iife, fool. Thug Iife, fool.

2094
01:52:53,958 --> 01:52:56,793
Do me a favor. Send your old man
some money every now and then.

2095
01:52:56,878 --> 01:52:59,004
Just a Iittle something.
It ain't got to be nothing.

2096
01:52:59,088 --> 01:53:02,382
Just four, five, $20,000, $30,000 a month
or something, you know?

2097
01:53:04,302 --> 01:53:05,469
You okay?

2098
01:53:05,553 --> 01:53:09,806
I'll put a Iittle something in an envelope.
Don't worry. We'll take care of you.

2099
01:53:09,891 --> 01:53:14,478
Okay. And Iisten, don't write no checks,
'cause I got a Iittle trouble with the IRS.

2100
01:53:14,562 --> 01:53:16,605
Okay. Well, it'll just be cash.

2101
01:53:16,689 --> 01:53:19,066
- Okay, good.
- Just be cash. That's the cleanest.

2102
01:53:19,150 --> 01:53:21,693
Yeah, yeah,
that's the way the dope boy do it.

2103
01:53:21,778 --> 01:53:24,238
- You can spend cash.
- Yes, you can. Yes, you can.

2104
01:53:24,322 --> 01:53:28,742
I know a Iot of ways to spend them.
I'll be making it rain.

2105
01:53:28,826 --> 01:53:30,869
- Joe, a real pleasure meeting you.
- Yeah?

2106
01:53:30,954 --> 01:53:32,955
- Yeah, get your hand off me, son.
- I'm sorry.

2107
01:53:33,039 --> 01:53:34,957
I don't Iike people touching me.
Folks don't wash their hands.

2108
01:53:35,041 --> 01:53:37,000
AII right, Dad.

2109
01:53:37,085 --> 01:53:38,627
- AII right, son. Son.
- Dad.

2110
01:53:38,711 --> 01:53:40,170
- Okay.
- AII right.

2111
01:53:40,255 --> 01:53:42,214
- I Iove you now.
- I Iove you, too, Dad.

2112
01:53:42,298 --> 01:53:45,050
I Iove you.
I Iove you with the Iove of the Lord.

2113
01:53:45,134 --> 01:53:46,301
He thinks I'm his son.

2114
01:53:46,678 --> 01:53:49,179
Well, this has been a Iovely, Iovely, Iovely...

2115
01:53:49,931 --> 01:53:51,431
Been a great movie. Didn't you enjoy it?

2116
01:53:51,516 --> 01:53:52,641
Good night.

2117
01:53:53,376 --> 01:53:59,644
Edit, Sync and Cleaned - DirtySaint, 04, Feb 2019